I’m writing this cross-legged on the sofa, clutching a hot herbal tea and wondering what to chat to you about this week. I’m surrounded by a sea of pistachio shells, carefully constructed toys the kids begged me not to dismantle, and two snoring cats. It’s a glamorous life. Sometimes I wonder how many people out there read this. On the days when it all works out, I like to think there are lots of you. On the days when I cringe over words that seemed great just a few hours ago, I like to think there are none! But I was accosted yesterday by a group of fabulous 70-somethings who told me they look forward to this every week. So now I know there are at least five of you. Welcome!

If you have been reading these for a while, you’ll know that I’m a big fan of the overshare. I think I have to get it all out of my system before my girls are teenagers and ban me from writing anything personal. Fortunately, Gwyneth Paltrow recently took things to a whole new level and I will always, always seem tame in comparison. She recently shared the virtues of steam-cleaning her vagina with a gazillion blog readers. I am pretty sure that steam-cleaning should be reserved for carpets and expensive clothes. I am open-minded, but how do you even book that appointment? “Good morning, I’d like to …. I heard you can …. Could I possibly …. sorry, wrong number.” My God, can you imagine if you were actually brave enough and then you did get the wrong number?

Facebook is also awash with an inordinate amount of Too Much Information. There’s a new “Seven things you don’t know about me” craze going on, where you list yours and tag other people to participate. It’s all a brilliant waste of time and yet oddly fascinating. I’ve learned some random, useless but amazing things about some of my friends. And so, because my kids are growing superfast, I’m going to tell you seven things you don’t know about me while I still can. I’ll also share seven things you don’t know about nutrition. Re the latter: If it turns out you do actually know them all, you can write this next week! Deal?

Seven things you don’t know about me

1. I see 50 shades of grey

Don’t be disappointed, but there are no silver balls in my closet. I am also not colour blind. What I mean is, that I usually see every argument from every angle. That makes it hard to actually have an argument, because I have to think for a long time about what I really believe. Unless you want to discuss the benefits of real vs processed food, and then I am passionately blinkered.

2. I have two tattoos

Although doesn’t everyone these days? One I did for a deep and meaningful reason, one I did to show-off. Guess which one I regret?

3. I’m half Hungarian

My Dad is Hungarian but left the country with some of his family when he was two. He didn’t see his Dad again until he was 15 and then we visited a lot when I was younger. I got engaged in Budapest and for that and many other reasons, it will always be one of my favourite cities. I am still trying to make a healthy version of Hungarian chicken paprika. I am not sure that exists!

4. I don’t speak any Hungarian

Shameful, but it’s SO HARD! Actually I can say, yes, no and thank you. But that’s it. It’s on my list of ten billion things to do before I die.

5. I suffer from panic attacks

Maybe I have told you this. I can’t remember. I will probably panic about it later! It was completely debilitating and traumatic for several months and then I finally got it under control. Good nutrition helped me more than I can possibly say, but I had to be patient and forgiving of myself too.

6. I used to smoke cigarettes

It started when I was 14. I used to eat toothpaste and spray myself with deodorant afterwards so my parents wouldn’t know. Of course now I know they knew. I smoked on and off socially for years, but stopped when I began to study nutrition. I can’t believe I did it now!

7. I am terribly afraid of the dentist

Which makes no sense, because I have a wonderful one. I am always just scared of the teeny tiny chance of hitting a nerve, or the drill slipping. I have got worse as I have got older!

Seven things you don’t know about nutrition

1. Putting milk in your tea inhibits antioxidant function

Here’s some annoying information for you. Tea is rich in antioxidants, but recent research suggests that adding milk (which most of us do) neutralises the effect of those antioxidants. The same goes for soy milk but I haven’t seen research on almond, flax or coconut milk. So either drink it black or try green or rooibos tea, both of which are antioxidant rich and typically drunk without milk.

2. There’s no cholesterol in your French fries

If you thought deep-fried fries were bad for your heart, you were right, but not because they contain cholesterol. Cholesterol is made in the liver so is only found in things that come from something that had a liver. Cows have livers, therefore all beef and dairy products contain cholesterol. Shrimps and lobsters have livers too. But potatoes do not. The only conceivable way your fries could contain cholesterol is if they are posh fries cooked in duck fat, or if they have been covered in cheese.

3. There’s more caffeine in your diet coke than regular coke

Weird huh? But that’s because you don’t get the sugary pick-me-up from Diet Coke, so they put more caffeine in it to compensate.

4. Diet soda won’t help you lose weight

Artificial sweeteners in diet sodas have been shown to negatively affect gut bacteria, leading to more weight gain. In addition it’s worth noting that artificial sweeteners keep stimulating your sweet tooth (perpetuating sugar cravings) and have been linked to mood swings, headaches and depression.

5. Carrots were first grown in Afghanistan

We think of them as a very ordinary vegetable but the first cultivated carrot in recorded history came from Afghanistan around 900AD. While we’re on the subject of carrots, note that baby carrots are not a unique species. They are either immature carrots, hence their small size, or pieces of larger, thin carrots filed down to size. This is typically done to blemished carrots that would otherwise have been thrown away. So a baby carrot is rarely a special carrot, it’s usually the inside of a crap carrot.

6. There’s ammonia in your beef

Because beef can get contaminated with faeces during processing, it’s usually rinsed with an ammonia solution before it leaves the plant. Gross!

7. There’s wood pulp in your ice cream

If you see powdered cellulose on the ingredient label, think twice. It’s made from tiny pieces of plant and wood fibre and is used to make low-fat ice-cream more creamy. It’s also used in some shredded cheese brands to stop the cheese from clumping. Tempting?

The advice given in this article is not intended to replace medical advice, but to complement it. Always consult your GP if you have any health concerns. Catherine Burns BA Hons, Dip ION is the managing director of Natural Ltd and a fully qualified nutritional therapist trained by the Institute for Optimum Nutrition in the UK. Please note that she is not a registered dietitian. For details, please go to www.natural.bm or call 236-7511. Join Catherine on Facebook: www.facebook.com/nutrifitandnaturalnutritionbermuda