Log In

Reset Password
BERMUDA | RSS PODCAST

His friends aren’t my type of company

Duration of pregnancy depends on when you calculate the beginning of gestation to be

Dear Dr Nekia,

I am dating someone new and because we have decided to take our relationship a bit more seriously, we have introduced one another to our friends. So far, he enjoys being around my friends, but I must admit that I do not like most of his. I have been honest with him, and he only seems to get angry with me and says that accepting his friends is a part of being with him. I really just do not think that his friends are my kind of company and would prefer not to be around them. Am I wrong?

Sincerely, They’re Not My Friends

Dear They’re Not My Friends,

This is a case where both of you have valid points. On one hand accepting his support system is a part of being in a relationship with him, but on the other hand you should not be forced to keep company with anyone you choose not to. I think that when we do not accept those who are important to our partners, it can be taken personally. Rejection of those who mean so much to an individual can often be transferred as rejection of that individual because the support system is viewed as being an extension of who we are. Support systems usually are cohesive groups and, much like relationships, they act as one when they get together. Extending an invitation to your partner to come into and be a part of such groups is an important step into opening up to share your life with him or her. So in this case, your man may be feeling slighted. You will want to try your best to develop a level of tolerance and acceptance that is both comfortable to you and your man. You do not want him to feel as though he has to choose between you and his friends, neither do you want to feel as though you are being forced into situations. You do not have to be friends with his friends, but you should at least be polite and cordial.

Dear Dr Nekia,

My partner and I both enjoy sex thoroughly but lately we have become a bit bored with it all. He is bored with the routine and I am bored with the fact that it is always over by the time that I get started. Help, because we are both becoming disconnected.

Sincerely, Sexually Bored

Dear Sexually Bored,

It is very easy for couples to get into a routine. This is especially true for couples who enjoy having sex very frequently. At some point, everything that you do will seemingly become routine, boring or mundane. Many couples simply run out of things to do and places to explore. For your situation it may be best for focus to be placed on his inability to last long enough for you to be pleased. The reason for this is twofold: one, he will gain staying power and two, the journey to gaining staying power is in and of itself something new and out of the ordinary for the both of you. There are many lessons to learn and exercises to perform that lead up to a man being able to increase his erection strength and life. Depending upon the reasons for his inability to last long enough he will need to retrain his mind, body, and penis to respond in the way that is most enjoyable for the both of you. At the same time, you will want to learn how to become more receptive to your lover, which will lead to faster and better orgasms for yourself. Sex education is often the sterile teachings of anatomical body parts and pregnancy and disease, however true sex education encompasses so much more. We tend to learn how to be sexual from porn, friends, and other impressionable sources, however we truly lack education and instruction on the truths and understanding of our human sexuality and sexual relationships. I find that many of us let our egos get in the way of telling us that we know what to do when we really do not. This is a great source of sex being unfulfilling because the ego gets in the way and then craves more and different experiences that inevitably leaves us unsatisfied. Thus we are always searching for that something or someone new. I would advise that, as a couple, you take a journey to exploring the lesser known how-to’s of sex, which will rejuvenate and prolong your intimate experiences. Focus first on relearning your own body and selves, and then relearning one another. You will want to begin your journey by having open dialogue because communication is the foundation to every relationship and sexual experience. Through it, you both can overcome reservations and anxiety surrounding feelings of vulnerability or inadequacy while becoming more at ease with expressing your wants, your needs, and your fears.

Dear Dr Nekia,

I am pregnant and have heard many different answers to my question of how long is pregnancy supposed to last. My doctor says 36-38 weeks, while other sources say 36, and others still, say 40-plus. What is the correct answer?

Sincerely, Pregnant and Confused

Dear Pregnant and Confused,

Human gestation or duration of pregnancy depends upon when you calculate the beginning of gestation to be. If you count from conception, it is usually 40 weeks or ten months. However, if you count from the date of your last menstrual period, it will usually be 38 weeks. With that being said, the law of averages usually is at play when it comes to medical science so human gestation between 36 and 40 weeks is considered full-term, healthy, and normal.

• Want relationship advice? E-mail nakedtruth@royalgazette.com