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Sometimes good comes out of bad

Forging a new start: according to Nina London, a bad experience can forge rebirth, a new happiness, a deep love you never imagined (Photograph by Lana Leksina)

Is it bad what happens to us, just bad? Two weeks ago, Bill and I attended the Bermuda International Film Festival.

It is an important cultural event here, one which highlights the best in world cinema and allows us to watch rare documentary, short and foreign films.

We saw several fine movies. It is such a great way to educate and entertain ourselves and to escape from quiet Somerset Village during dark spring evenings.

One French film was very challenging. It was one-and-a-half hours of complex intellectual conversations between characters that had no warmth and showed no empathy or affection towards each other.

Each character tried to upstage the next with their cleverness and cold insight.

It was very difficult for me to watch. In order to understand the conversation, I needed to divide my attention between the French subtitles, my native Russian language and what little was happening on the screen.

I was terribly bored, mentally tired and I felt as if I was doing an arduous job.

Why was I wasting my time? I don’t know why I didn’t leave, and instead continued watching and listening carefully.

On the way home, Bill and I discussed the film at length. We laughed because if the film sparked this much conversation among people who did not even like it, then something powerful is happening after all.

We decided art is sometimes a difficult experience and is successful if it makes you think deeply.

For some reason, one phrase from the movie sank somewhere deep in my subconscious.

Yesterday, it suddenly surfaced and shone brightly. It was an unusual clue and a new approach to a project on which I have been working on for more than a year.

I smiled thinking that if I had not watched that film, I would never have thought of such a clever solution by myself.

I believe this reveals an important rule that we can apply to many things in our lives: when bad things happen to us, try and find a grain of good.

It is like holding Bermuda sand and seeing flakes of pink coral mixed with all the whites and greys. When you see this delicate colour, you smile.

We tend to give a categorical assessment of events that happen to us: either good or bad. Yet, often good comes out of bad.

Perhaps it was bad but also a vital step on the way to something new and wonderful.

How many times in life have we said: “Looking back, I am actually glad it happened to me (divorce, lost job, even disease). Because of it, I met the love of my life, I found a more fulfilling job, I became a better person.”

It’s like panning for gold. Even a tiny nugget of beauty will make our sad experience less bitter.

It may speak to you in unforeseeable ways. Perhaps, it could even help you reconcile with your past.

Sometimes adversity reveals a well of kindness deep in the human heart; a silent spring that lies still and untouched, then flows swiftly to smooth a stranger’s path.

A bad experience can forge rebirth, a new happiness, a deep love you never imagined.

“Out of the ashes rises the Phoenix!” In all dark experience sleeps this mythical bird, who may awaken and spread its golden wings in glorious flight.

Nina London is a certified wellness and weight-management coach. Her mission is to support and inspire mature women to make positive changes in their body and mind. Share your inspirational stories with her at ninalondon.com