Fathers in Bermuda devastated after being separated from their children are on a mission to change the law and the mindset on custody. Reporter Karen Smith talks to some dads about why the issue has driven them to distraction. All the names have been changed to protect the identity of the children.

When John had been a father to his only child for just a month, his wife and partner of 13 years dropped the bombshell that she was leaving him.

The world he had known was ripped apart in one fell swoop and, so, too, was the relationship he had hoped to build with his new born son.

That time in his life 12 years' ago was hard beyond belief, but, overcome with emotion this week, he told how it had failed to get easier as he had continuously fought for decent rights as a father. Despite dozens of trips to court, an excellent record, and his obvious love for his son, John gets to see his son only every other weekend, the odd holiday, and maybe for one week in summer.

Now living in a very small apartment, he claimed he had lost his large property to his wife, his rights as a full-time father, and his life.

The path has been hard, and fatherhood has not been what he envisaged, but the doting dad said, despite the odds, he had fought a slow fight to build a sound relationship with his boy.

"I have been through no less than seven lawyers since the day she left me, and I have realised over the years that it doesn't matter how much you spend, fathers will always end up with nothing," said John. "There is no point in hiring a lawyer.

"I get my son for two nights every other weekend. How that can be fair? He wants to see more of me and I want to see him, but his mother would rather he go to his friend's house or stay home alone than be with me. The situation is ridiculous."

John said at his ex-wife's insistence, he is not allowed to take his son on a boat, or visit him at school, unless she specifically allows it. And when it comes to taking him off the Island, he also needs his ex-wife's permission. However, he said although she also needed his permission to take their son overseas, she never requests it and is never penalised by the courts.

"Years' ago, it was put into the court order that I could not take my own son on a boat because he could not swim," explained John. "Today, he is an excellent swimmer, but still that order stands, and yet, his mother has a boat and can take him out.

"During the summer holidays, I had a week off work and my son was off school, yet we were not allowed to spend any extra time together. I sat home alone, and so did he, simply because his mother would not allow it. He called me up saying he wanted to come over, but what could I do?

"I get to see my son 48 days per annum, provided his mother works with me, and that is another struggle. There have been years when I have seen my son just six times, yet the courts did nothing when she broke the order.

"When a man doesn't pay child support, he goes to jail, yet when a mother refuses to allow a father to see his children, little is done."

Kevin has been left bitter and angry after his wife left without warning and moved to America, taking their five-week-old baby daughter with her five years ago.

He said it took him years to track her down, but when he did he hired a lawyer in the US to help him fight his case.

And in return, he claimed his wife falsely accused him of physically abusing her, something he vehemently denied.

"I did not see my daughter for almost three years - I don't think anyone can understand how that feels," said Kevin.

"She was kidnapped and taken away from me, yet nobody has ever made my wife accountable for that.

"I was devastated when she accused me of abusing her. That is not me. She was able to make that claim against me without any proof, and it stuck. She knew exactly what she was doing and, as a result, she got custody.

"I'm not saying for one minute that women do not get physically abused, because they do. But people must also realise that some women are manipulative and make these claims simply to get what they want."

Kevin said his wife eventually moved back to Bermuda and wanted to get back with him, but he refused. As a result, he said he seldom gets to see his five-year-old daughter.

"The first few years of a child's life are so vital for forming relationships and trust, yet I am missing out on that," said Kevin. "Every time I see her I have to start all over again. I feel I have nowhere to turn for help.

"People in Bermuda, including the courts, seem to believe that men cannot be caring and loving. There are a lot of broken men out there who simply give up because they can't fight anymore."

And father Jermaine said he believed more needed to be done to protect fathers who were falsely accused by women.

He told how he was arrested six years ago after the mother of his then nine-year-old daughter alleged that he had abused the child.

He was arrested by Police while working and kept in a cell overnight, only then to be released without any action the next day after the mother failed to co-operate with officers.

He was then prevented from seeing his daughter, even though he had custody of her brother.

However, all that changed in April this year when the mother and daughter fell out and she no longer wanted the responsibility of a teenage girl.

The mother sent her daughter to Jermaine's house, and now that is where she remains. In June, the mother went to a lawyer and handed all care and control rights over to the father, although its doubtful how substantive they are as, again, the parents were never married, so he has little rights.

He said: "The child has been in my custody since April. I am her biological father, and her mother has handed all rights to me, yet I have to go to court for them to determine whether I am fit enough to look after her.

"When my daughter came to me this year aged 15, she had never had a cup of tea in her life.... and had lived in fear of her mother.

"My daughter has suffered emotionally at the hands of her mother. Criminal charges could even follow because her mother even tried to suffocate her a few weeks ago, yet they can't decide if I'm fit?

"I have been told to pay for counselling for my daughter to help correct the stress her mother put her through. Something is very wrong with this system. Her mother is not accountable for what has happened, yet I feel as though everything is against me as a father.

"I will always be there for my children and I am delighted to have the opportunity to be with my daughter again, but what has happened to us is not right. It should never have been this way in the first place.

"The system has to be changed to prevent things like this happening to fathers in the future."