WHY on earth anyone ever described the Premier, Alex Scott, as the "master of spin" is beyond me.

Also beyond me is how he ever managed to run an advertising agency. One would presume that to be successful in that regard would require an ability to sway the public in favour of your clients' concepts and Mr. Scott is clearly incapable of promoting even his own.

In all things related to the ever important political tool of public relations he is absolutely clueless. The saddest part of it all ? aside from the fact we're paying him ? is how he manages to fail when the situation isn't controversial, when there's no need for anything but the straight truth.

The concept of sustainable development isn't a hard one to sell. As economist Robert Stewart pointed out last week, how many people are likely to criticise a plan for conservation and preservation?

Thanks to Mr. Scott there are now plenty.

Government announced last week plans to rebuild King Edward VII Memorial Hospital in the middle of the Botanical Gardens, a national park. The $500-million proposal was made public courtesy of a media leak to the ? Government intended to keep us in the dark a little longer.

The ridiculous plan was announced in the middle of a Government drive to educate residents on the topic of sustainable development , based on the findings of the Sustainable Development team, it runs contrary to the public's desire for land conservation. Did no one in the Government understand it would take a darn good "spin" to convince the public why this is necessary?

I'd have found experts willing to testify the Botanical Gardens was under siege from some horrible blight and would never recover. I'd have proved beyond a doubt that the area was unusable. I'd "spin" it so that members of the public were thanking me for being smart enough to find some way of putting the land to use and providing them with a first-class hospital.

Instead we got an "official" explanation from Health Minister Patrice Minors indicating it was necessary to rob us of valued parkland instead of rebuilding KEMH on its present site, because to do so would take two years longer, cost more than $100 million extra and be less safe when one considered the engineering and logistical risks of keeping a hospital running while it is demolished and rebuilt. I'm truly amazed as to why a Government willing to go $50-odd million over budget on a school to be utilised by a relative few ? and which will eventually need replacing ? would not spend an extra $100 million and preserve a national park forever. And then the real jokes started.

It doesn't take a wise person to realise a public meeting on sustainable development is likely to be attended by those who care about the subject.

Faced with persons who recognise a need for preservation and conservation, Mr. Scott argued it was necessary to rebuild KEMH in the Botanical Gardens or, in his words, "this pristine area".

As a means of preserving the beauty of what we now have, he insisted he would instruct the architects to incorporate a unique hospital design.

And here, of course, comes the now infamous quote: "This means that greenery will be incorporated into the design. You won't just walk up to the door and the green stops. The green may go into the building. If there's a tree that needs sustaining, you may find that tree next to your hospital bed in the future."

And as if to sock it to us all, he complained that the consultation process involved in finding a new location for the hospital was taking too long: "There have been meetings after meetings after meetings to get feedback. There comes a point in time when a decision has to be taken."

This from a Government which, until recently, was holding meetings to "educate" the public on Independence despite polls indicating 70 per cent of the island is against breaking ties with Britain.

Give me a break. Somewhere out there, there's a movie producer who'd be willing to pay millions for the rights to this farce. God help us.