Dear Annie: I need an outside opinion. I was in the process of repairing the windows on my garage, only to discover that they do not make this type of window anymore. My neighbours of 15 years, who I’d thought were our friends, recently replaced their garage windows with glass block ones. Since my original windows were not available, I decided to go with glass block windows, also.I called my neighbour and told her that she had good taste and we were going to get similar windows. She was furious and berated me like you wouldn’t believe. I thought she was joking when she said if we put in glass block windows, she would never speak to me or my wife again and the friendship would be over.

We installed glass block windows anyway, and the neighbours are not talking to us. Our windows look totally different than theirs. Ours have black bars in front and are partially covered by bushes. Also, our two houses are not alike in size, shape, colour or landscaping. In addition, after touring the neighbourhood, we see that there are eight other houses in the immediate area with glass block windows. I don’t understand the big deal. The neighbours won’t answer our phone calls (they have caller ID). I wrote them a letter and apologised, saying imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but nothing.

I really hate to end this friendship over something so trivial. It makes no sense to lose sleep over windows. Is it possible more is going on? Any advice? — PerplexedDear Perplexed: <$>Is there a mutual friend who might be willing to act as an intermediary? It would help to have someone speak to the neighbours, explaining that you meant no disrespect, that the windows look entirely different on your house, and that you’d like to patch things up. If the neighbours still value their windows over their neighbours, it wasn’t much of a friendship to begin with.

Dear Annie$>I have been married to my husband for 15 years. His 50th birthday is coming up, and we’ve been planning a special party for over a year. His two children will not be attending. Why? Their mother bought them tickets for an event out of town. My husband is very hurt, but he will never say anything to them.This is the second time she has done something like this. The first time was over Father’s Day. When the kids were younger and we attended events together, the ex-wife insisted that the kids sit with her the entire time. I thought when the kids got older, she would stop. And what’s worse, the kids are in their 20s now and old enough to decide what to do, but are afraid to upset Mom. Annie, these children lived with us until they were 18. Their mother was the one who left the marriage.

I am tired of my husband being their doormat and want him to show some backbone. They only call or come around when they need something. What can we do? — The Stepmot<$>Dear Stepmother: Grown or not, these children still hurt from their mother’s abandonment and crave her love. They fear if they refuse her conniving gestures, she will desert them again. The best thing you can do for your husband is to love his children anyway and allow him to decide how he wants to handle them. It will not help your marriage if you convince him to cut them off. He will only blame you later for causing an estrangement.