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BERMUDA | RSS PODCAST

Enough is enough. So what do we do now?

Police work the scene at Belvin's Variety on Happy Valley Road where two men were shot dead last month.

Every now and then we get on to the subject of what do we do about the continuing rise of violence. We are losing, it seems, one young Bermudian male per week!!The media this week published a statistic that since 2000 we have lost 140 young men through road fatalities. Throw in those gunned down in violence and we have ourselves a phenomenon, an epidemic problem.It is bad enough that we have a shortage of good men, even without the murders and road fatalities 2013 is shaping up to be a very bad year, in terms of lives lost.Enough is enough. So what do we do now?Let’s start by holding fathers accountable for their children. We can no longer allow men to renege on their duty to parent, love, provide and care for the children they produce. I know that this can be difficult, especially in situations where the parents are no longer in an intimate relationship; but this is no excuse. You made the kid, so you must raise the kid; whether you’re still with the mother or not.I was listening to Deputy Commissioner Mike Jackman at the recent forum held by the Bermuda Police Service. He spoke about his own experiences as a father to two boys and he is absolutely correct.He said that if you’re a dad to a boy, you have to get your tired butt up and go to football and cricket games on Saturday mornings; he said that parents should be dragging these young men to church with them. People are going to disagree with me on this but my retort will be that when fathers did what we are proposing here, and when parents took kids to church, we didn’t have what we have today. So there must be something in it.I am thinking about the removal of religious knowledge as a subject in the school curriculum, clearly a bad idea. Many parents don’t take their kids to church so school may be the only place where students get any semblance of religious instruction. Do you now see where in the old days we had ways to fill the gaps and catch people who may have fallen through the cracks? This is just a simple example. There are many others.If you’re a dad to a little girl, you are not exempt from spending time with her and being accountable as a father. You also have a duty to show your daughter how a good man should behave, how he ought to treat women, how he should raise his children, how he should function in society, etc.I believe that if a young lady has no relationship with her father, she is likely to have behavioural issues in her intimate relationships as she matures.The moral of this story is that parents have to step up and be parents. The people who made the children should ultimately raise those children. People shouldn’t have children until they are ready, mature, established in careers such that they can afford to care for and raise their children and are ready to put your own needs second to those of your child/children. That is the ideal scenario; not what we have today in many cases.So when we have a scenario whereby parents are not doing their jobs; plan B has to come into play. Plan B is when the grandparents, aunts, uncles, godparents, extended family and the entire village kick in to close the gaps, to make sure that no child is left behind.I challenge my peers, the older members of society especially the men to take back control of the village. Be visible in your neighbourhood; tell people that you are taking control of it, gather up a few other men in the area, tell the drug dealers that they can’t be selling drugs in your neighbourhood or that you will call the police. You will be surprised that the level of order that will return to your area if these steps are taken.I realise that these dealers have guns but I refuse to live my life in fear. We have to stand up to these men and say enough is enough. Standing up for your community and all the children in it, get people who have information about people involved in illegal activity to give this information to the police, so that the drug trade and the related violence can eventually be arrested.Then there are godparents. People get this role twisted, thinking that being a godparent means that you get to stand up at a Christening and pose, giving Christmas and birthday presents and that’s’ it. Nope. That is the least important role. The main role of a godparent is that you are expected to be responsible for and raise, or play a role in raising that child, if anything happens to their parents, such that the parents can no longer raise that child. Gifts are nice, but the best gift you can give is the gift of your time and talent to that child, especially when you know that the parents are not getting it done and the child is going astray.If we can get some of this done, we will be on our way to raising better kids, creating a better environment for raising well-adjusted people, reducing crime and violence and saving the lives of some of our men.Peace ... DJLT.And now, the top 20Holding at #1 is Locked Out Of Heaven by Bruno Mars.Up to #2 is Beauty and a Beat by Justin Bieber and Nicky Minaj.Improving to #3 is Don’t Stop The Party, by Pitbull.Falling to #4 is Diamonds by Rihanna, the most popular artist on the planet.Improving to #5 is a former essential new tune, Thrift Shop by Macklemore and Ryan Lewis featuring Wanz.Up to #6 is a former essential new tune, Whistle, by Flo Rida.Slipping to #7 is Let Me Love You (Until you Learn to Love Yourself) by Ne-yoDown two spaces to #8 is Die Young by Ke$ha.Up to #9 is Scream and Shout by will.i.am and Britney Spears.Advancing to #10 is I Found You by The Wanted.Down to #11 is Gangnam Style by PSYImproving to #12 is Right Now by the queen of pop, Rihanna, featuring David Guetta, a recent essential new tune.Up to #13 is Too Close by Alex Clare.Improving to #14 is Na Na Na by Akon.Falling to #15 is Big Banana by Havana Brown featuring R3hab.On the way up at #16 is F*ckn Problems by A$ap Rocky.Climbing to #17 is Neva End by Kelly Rowland and Future.Jumping up to #18 is My Confession by Demarco.Tumbling to #19 is Anything Could Happen by Ellie Goulding.Now this week’s essential new tune. In at #20 is Don’t You Worry Child, by the Swedish House Mafia featuring John Martin. This is a monster dance track with loads of energy, a cool story and a catchy chorus. Definitely a must have for any DJ. I would love to attend one of their concerts. Must be quite an experience.