Dear Annie: Over the last couple of years, I have come to realise that I am married to an 80-year-old man, even though he is only 31 and I am 29.

On a typical day, “Jeremy” leaves for work at 4.30 a.m. and gets home 12 hours later. I know he works hard and is stressed, but he never does anything except eat dinner and then log onto the computer. He isn’t looking at porn or stuff like that, but he does play an online game called World of Warcraft. He even plays during dinner. He logs on the moment he gets home and doesn’t get off until 9 p.m. Of course, by then, he’s too tired to do anything except crawl into bed.

We have two children, eight and five, and Jeremy never does anything with them. I’m also feeling the big chill. We never go anywhere or do anything. On the rare occasion I can get him to go out, he sulks like a two-year-old. I won’t go into our sex life, but we average about twice a month. The lack of intimacy is a real problem. We tried counselling a few years ago, but Jeremy refuses to go again. Any thoughts would be nice. — Warcraft Widow

Dear Widow:<$> Jeremy is addicted to his online game. It’s not uncommon, particularly with World of Warcraft, and you won’t be able to wean him off it without his cooperation. It’s become his alternate reality, and he likes it there. (There is actually a website for people who have found reasons to quit at wowdetox.com, or try On-Line Gamers Anonymous at olganon.org.)

We suggest you remind Jeremy of the “Ring of Protection” he put on your finger. Now that you have his attention, talk to him about what else is important in his life and where the monthly subscription fee could be better used. Then find interesting things to distract him from the game and take a vacation away from the computer.

Dear Annie: I’m the youngest of three children in a single-parent household. Of the three of us, I have the weakest relationship with my mother. If something happens to upset her, I get in trouble. She thinks I hate her boyfriend, which isn’t true, and she has told me that all the problems between her and her own mother are my fault. It is really depressing.

I’ve learned to brush off some of these comments. The problem is, I just started college and want a better relationship with my mom. I live on campus and want to be able to call her and talk about school, boys, whatever. What can I do to finally get on her good side? — Anonymous

Dear Anonymous: Honey, it sounds like your mother has some serious issues of her own, and it has nothing to do with you. It’s possible that your relationship will improve now that you are no longer living at home, but if not, please try the counselling services available at your college. Also, use this time to grow and develop, make mature friendships, and be the person you know you can be. Your life is what you make of it. Don’t let Mom have you believe otherwise.

Dear Annie: <$>I am 21 years old and afraid of death. I’m not sick or anything, but I avoid funerals and cemeteries. I recently had to go to a relative’s funeral, and now thoughts of death are stuck in my mind.

I’ve not told anyone about this. How do I forget about death for a while and continue living? — Louisiana

Dear Louisiana: No one enjoys funerals or death, and a certain amount of discomfort is normal. It is a problem only if it disrupts your life. Try talking to your clergyperson, and if that doesn’t help, contact the Anxiety Disorders Association of America (www.adaa.org), 8730 Georgia Ave., Suite 600, Silver Spring, MD 20910.