In praise of bus drivers. Consider the size of our everyday 36ft Bermuda bus that on the average weighs in between nine and 12 tons (18,000 to 24,000 pounds) curb weight - without passengers.

When you add 60 to 80 sitting and standing adults of many sizes with a cumulative 16,000 pounds, the total weight load is a monstrous 36,000 pounds.

Driving at a slow average of 30 miles per hour, these pink and blue cruisers cannot stop on a dime. Statistically in crash tests, with sharp driver time of 2.5 seconds to react, then brake, it takes about 175 feet to safely stop without locking up the wheels. One too close motorbike, one aimless pedestrian, at any time, catastrophe can happen.

Yet, each and every Bermuda bus driver is not only expected, but trained, to navigate these tiny island roads under absolutely insane driving conditions. Anticipating and narrowly missing the never-ending wave of kamikaze cycle groups aggressively vying to be the next Bermuda Bus sandwich, bus drivers swing in and out of traffic, generally with composure and vigilance.

I cannot but know that at the end of their shift, they have got to be totally exhausted. I could not do this job! They are volunteer marketeering specialists and psychologists for Bermuda, sorting out various confused and anxious tourists - none of whom ever have the tokens or the right change - all the while glacially enduring epithets, extended fingers, games of chicken, and freeze-outs from motorists who purport to share the same roads.

A freeze-out happens when motorists crowd the bus and refuse to let it pull out from bus stops. Common courtesy among the driving Bermuda public has disappeared. No one wants to give an inch when they are in a hurry, particularly to a lumbering bus. "It's all about me and my needs, you see," says George Public.

Bus drivers get no respect. This is not an easy job. They must be prepared for anything, at any time, always anticipating that some motorist will make some stupid manoeuvre that places their passengers at risk. They receive little respect for performing a necessary and vital function in our society, automated mobility.

"She stands in front of the moving closed bus door in her school uniform, beating on it with her fists (but not her pink cell phone). All of 13 years old, she is hurling four letter words at this driver, who is conducting himself appropriately by leaving on schedule.

"It is not his job to escort her on the bus; nor is it his fault she missed her ride. She's been standing right there in the terminal for ages otherwise engaged, refusing to take responsibility for her time.

"We are tripping along, the bus making good time into town. In the back, a food fight breaks out among six very imposing teenage boys while bottles are tossed out the window. One warning from Ms Lady Driver. They ignore her; she's no threat to them, she's just the driver.

"The vehicle pulls to a stop on a dime; the driver lady stands up, and throws the whole bunch off the bus.

"You will not mess up my bus. No manners, no ride," says she. And that was that!

"My absolute classic favorite story. It's a gorgeous Bermuda day; the bus is almost at capacity as we pull into the Horseshoe Bay stop. It is hot and everyone is tired. Standing there is your typical corporate America CEO-type. He is tapping his gold Rolex (or similar wrist flash) while holding the bus schedule. The driver opens the door; Corporate CEO opens his mouth. 'Are you aware that this bus is late? According to your schedule, this is totally unacceptable. Don't you people know anything about following the rules?' On he rants, for about two minutes. Impassively, Mr. Bus Driver says as he closes the door, 'Another bus will be along in about 15 minutes, sir.' Off we go, leaving Mr. Rule man in the dust.

Bus drivers routinely get up to assist the elderly on and off; they enforce manners on the young, and old alike, insisting they observe bus etiquette; they tolerate no swearing, rudeness, hands out windows, and public disturbances from anyone.

I have seen drivers at the end of a long shift reassure tourists that no, they are not lost and he/she will let them know when their stop has arrived. They are goodwill ambassadors, entertainers, advice dispensers, telling jokes and breaking into song when favourites are on the radio. There have been times when half the bus is engaged in a sing-a-long, including the visitors among us - laughing with amazement on their faces. Bermuda has always been a culture of manners and politeness for those with pride in their jobs.

It's a deal. $135 for three months, at a cost of $8 per day for single tickets, you've paid for three months in three weeks - a bargain. Now how much was it again to fill up your car, pay for parking?

I know these things are true - I take the magic bus every day. If you can, you should too. End of day recipe: Take me for a ride on the magic bus by The Who:

Every day I get in the queue (Too much, the Magic Bus) To get on the bus that takes me to you (Too much, the Magic Bus) I'm so nervous, I just sit and smile (Too much, the Magic Bus) Your house is only another mile (Too much, the Magic Bus) Thank you, driver, for getting me here (Too much, the Magic Bus) You'll be an inspector, have no fear (Too much, the Magic Bus) I don't want to cause no fuss (Too much, the Magic Bus) But can I buy your Magic Bus? (Too much, the Magic Bus) Nooooooooo! I don't care how much I pay (Too much, the Magic Bus) I wanna drive my bus to my baby each day (Too much, the Magic Bus) Magic Bus, Magic Bus, Magic Bus

Martha Harris Myron CPA -NH1929, CFP® -67184 (US licenses) TEP - Society of Trust and Estate Practitioners. She is a Senior Wealth Manager at Argus Financial Limited, specializing in comprehensive financial solutions and investment advisory services for individual private clients and their families, business owners, endowments and trusts. DirectLine: 294 5709 Confidential email can be directed to mmyron@argusfinancial.bm The article expresses the opinion of the author alone. Under no circumstances is the content of this article to be taken as specific individual investment advice, nor as a recommendation to buy/ sell any investment product. The Editor of the Royal Gazette has final right of approval over headlines, content, and length/brevity of article.