Reports of domestic violence are on the increase, with both men and women suffering torment within the confines of their home. In a series on physical abuse, reporter Karen Smith discovers that more needs to be done to enable male sufferers to speak out.

*** Men in Bermuda are choosing to suffer the torment of domestic abuse in silence partly because there are no male counsellors to hear their problems.

Men's group Childwatch, which was launched last autumn to support the rights of parents and promote the welfare of children, is about to kick start a campaign that it hopes will see more men join its ranks, and people trained as counsellors.

Co-ordinator of the group Eddie Fisher said at the moment there was no support system in place for men and not only did they have nowhere to turn for help, but society was biased against them.

He and other members of the group are hoping to secure funding to enable a full-time administrator to be employed, along with volunteer counsellors.

He said: "Men are reluctant to come forward anyway because society seems to come down on the side of the woman, but it does not help that there are no male counsellors to listen to them.

"It's not a very manly thing to say that you have suffered at the hands of a female, but I think some men feel it is impossible to explain to a woman what they are going through.

"I have a lot of respect for the female counsellors we have on the Island, but they are like fish out of water when it comes to men talking about abuse from females. They are not trained to look at things from a male perspective.'' Mr. Fisher said he had no idea how few male counsellors there were on the Island until he contacted a number of the agencies asking them to send male representatives to meet with members of the Childwatch group.

"I was absolutely shocked to find that they had no male representatives, time after time,'' he added.

"How we can ever begin to address the problems of men if we do not have the people in place to help them? "Even Social Services seems very much engineered towards the feminine domain.'' He said besides the shame and embarrassment, men feared that they themselves would be accused of violence if they reported suffering domestic abuse.

However, he also said some women, but certainly not all, incited their partners to use violence in order to have an excuse to divorce them, tear them away from their children, or even get them thrown out of the country.

He said there were a number of ex-patriates, both men and women, who were victims of domestic abuse and felt unable to report it for fear of being forced off the Island once they had left their partners.

Equally, he said there were many people pushed over the edge and incited into violence because their partners no longer wanted them here.

He said: "There is no excuse for violence because everyone should just walk away, but there is no doubt that some people are provoked into it.

"For example, a woman spitting in her husband's face and telling him that the children are not really his.

"Some people incite the physical abuse because they know that if they shout to the right people about it they will get the children, the house, the car, the money, and even their partners thrown off the Island if he or she does not have status.

"I'm not saying violence is right by any stretch of the imagination, but if you perpetrate it, you are partly to blame.'' Both The Women's Resource Centre and The Physical Abuse Centre said there was no doubt that men were victims of abuse, too. And they agreed, that there were few male counsellors and that too few men spoke about their anguish.

However, Counsellor at The Physical Abuse Centre Nina Jones said no matter how provoked anybody was, they should never turn to violence.

She said: "Anyone can provoke another person, but at the same time, it's only one person that makes the choice to lift up a hand and hit out.

"Everybody can choose to walk away -- they need not go down the road to violence.

"The responsibility is on both parties involved, but nobody deserves to be hit and that's the bottom line.

"And the truth is, as soon as someone decides to hit out they have lost -- and they have lost control of themselves.'' Calls made to Health and Social Services Minister Nelson Bascome about domestic violence and the lack of male counsellors have not been returned for more than a week.

Anyone interested in more information about Childwatch or assisting with counselling should call the group on 234-2858.