A mother of two who was treated as “a prisoner” by an abusive husband is making a fresh start thanks to the Centre Against Abuse.

After years of suffering she bravely found the strength to seek help for her own sake and that of her two children.

And the 42-year-old Bermudian, who asked to remain anonymous, praised the support and assistance of the Centre in helping her to build a new life.

“It was verbal, mental, economic abuse,” she said. “I didn’t have any control of my being. I was suffering from depression, I wasn’t talking, my self-esteem had diminished. I thought it was normal.

“I had no say in our finances. I’m a housewife, I had no job, no money. He refused to give me money for my phone or for gas — I didn’t even have bus tickets. He kept me a prisoner. I had no say in the home — I wasn’t allowed to open the mail or even get it from the mailbox. It wasn’t a home, it was his house.”

The victim said she did not live with her spouse before they were married.

He quickly became controlling and would verbally abuse her and destroy her confidence.

“The cover was beginning to come off and it was really scary,” she said. “Abuse isn’t just physical abuse. Mental abuse is very traumatic.”

After nearly three years of marriage and suffering, she finally fled with her children a month ago, initially to the Centre’s safe house.

“I needed help. As a Christian you’re told to stay but I reached out,” she said.

“Someone can contact the Centre for you if you don’t want to do it, that’s what I did.

“Within a week of that first contact I was out of the house. It was that quick.

“The Centre was very welcoming and safe, I didn’t have to watch my back. It was a sea of relief to know this wasn’t normal and you don’t have to put up with it.”

The Centre was “amazing” with her children, two teenagers from her first marriage, which ended when they were babies. “My children saw I wasn’t able to be a mommy,” she said. “They’ve been very understanding, they’re very intelligent children and they know if mommy goes quiet that’s not me. I had to think of my children. They were happy to leave.”

The victim praised the support she received from the Centre and her friends in the community.

“It’s a very difficult process of healing, it’s still going on. But I’m much safer and happier,” she said.

“I can call the Centre anytime and they are there — they are very good women down there. They don’t help you leave then leave you, they follow up. I was able to obtain knowledge and stop it. I’ve also had the support of my church family, they’ve teamed up with people in the community and helped with food — they’ve really gone the extra mile. And my family were very supportive and helped me to move.”

She is now urging anyone with an abusive partner to seek help from the Centre.

“The first step is talking about it, or write it down, that’s what I did.

“I didn’t know the Centre existed and that’s the problem — a lot of women don’t know there’s help out there.

“Women need to be educated. Know the signs, you may know somebody who needs help — if you know a person is withdrawn. It’s not a personal issue, it’s a community issue. Stop living in fear and that will be the beginning of a new life and new start.”