Chameleon, Wyndham Bermuda Resort and Spa, South Shore Road, Southampton

A weekend at a luxury hotel at the dawn of summer ? is there anything better? Not that I can think of. A few days of pampering by the pool, jug of Pimms in hand, with a dress-up dinner to look forward to in the evening. Bliss.

Actually what should have been a relaxing weekend turned into something of a nightmare. We pulled up outside the newly restored former Sonesta Beach last Friday evening only to be greeted by the bark of some loud-mouthed Gestapo-type ? we had mistakenly parked up in a completely empty taxi-designated zone.

Check-in took an age while two front desk staff struggled to process our booking. Once in our room we found ourselves looking not out to sea but across the aforementioned car park, which was blocked only partially by water tanks, laundry rooms and other unsavoury aspects of the back end of a hotel. To make matters worse, a door somewhere in the building well within earshot kept on banging open and slamming shut. Oh dear.

Unfortunately we were too late for supper on our first evening and had to find other hunting grounds instead. Not to worry, there?s always Saturday night.

We headed for Chameleon?s dining room with a great deal of anticipation. Despite our bad experiences at the hotel ? which persisted right through our weekend ? this is Wyndham?s signature restaurant and promised to provide something classy. Furthermore, we had eaten at the hotel?s sushi bar, Sazanami, a few weeks earlier and had been pleasantly surprised.

Anticipation began to evaporate the moment we stepped inside what can only be described as a cavernous factory canteen. Granted, as a hotel restaurant the space has to cater for buffet-style breakfasts and lunches but couldn?t the designers have partitioned off a section for a more intimate atmosphere? The burnt orange wooden panelling and walls of deep blue helped to warm up the place, but it still had the feel of a school dining room.

We eventually hiked across an expanse of carpet to a corner table, had our drink orders taken, and then waited. And waited. And then we waited some more.

It then occurred to us that we could eat en plein air. Taking matters into our own hands and tired of waiting for our ?server? to arrive, we moved to an outside table overlooking the bay.

Sitting under the stars among floodlit palms, with the roll of surf as our background music, things instantly improved. A waiter, drinks, menus, warm bread and apologies magically arrived. Okay, let?s start again shall we?

Not surprisingly Chameleon offers the sort of ?International? cuisine that?s found in hotels not only Island-wide but across the globe. The menu was made up of an eclectic mix with plenty of options for everybody. Typical appetisers include a chilled Asian vegetable spring rolls or roast pumpkin soup with cilantro cream while amongst the entrees honey mustard Australian rack of lamb, pan seared Atlantic salmon with lobster mash, and char broiled Black Angus filet mignon with horseradish jus grabbed our attention.

To kick things off we eventually decided on something fishy ? scallops on a bed of greens with a warm, dill-scented cream on the side for him, grilled tiger prawns with a citrus avocado relish for her. Both dishes were beautifully presented on pure white ceramic plates while the ingredients and cooking were equally well executed. A delicious start.

Main courses went down just as successfully. The lobster-stuffed roast veal loin, accompanied by buttery mash and crisp asparagus tips, was rich and satisfying, the meat soft and velvety.

The delicately scented Jamaican Jerked capon breast was equally delicious and again perfectly cooked, crisp and savoury on the outside, still moist inside. Both plates were scraped clean.

Now normally one expects to pay through the nose when eating out at a hotel. We were therefore amazed to be presented with a bill for around $120. This for what can only be described as a first-rate meal with wine, a beautiful beachside setting, and, when it finally arrived, excellent service. (Our waiter, Edgar, who garnered equally high marks when he served us at Sazanami last month, obviously knows his stuff and enjoys his job.)

Far too full for dessert, we enjoyed a couple of coffees before contentedly heading back to our room, thankful that it was just an elevator ride away.

As a hotel, Wyndham really isn?t much to write home about. Rooms are, at best, basic while some of the staff appeared totally incompetent. To add insult to injury, two cocktails in the lobby?s Pearl Onion bar set us back nearly $20. That has more than just a whiff of bad value for money about it ? it positively reeks with the stench of exploitation.

And just when things couldn?t get any worse, our party, including four young children, was thrown out of the pool area on Sunday morning simply because we had checked out of our rooms, even though we hadn?t arrived until late in the day on Friday. Perhaps it was because we were natives and paying a knockdown resident rate, but that?s no excuse for shoddy service. We felt as if we didn?t matter and the staff didn?t care.

But this is a restaurant review, not a hotel review, and though it pains me to say it, Chameleon gets top marks. It was undoubtedly the highlight of an otherwise very disappointing and very expensive weekend.

In short, if you fancy a relaxing weekend break without the hassle of flying, we have to say that Wyndham should be avoided ? there are plenty of far superior hotels on the Island. But if you?re looking for a decent dinner out, with excellent food, service and ? providing it?s warm enough for outside eating ? ambience, you could do a lot worse than Chameleon. Check it out, but don?t check in.