A top Bermudian insurance executive who recently returned to the Island after an extended period abroad offered his own personal report card yesterday on the state of local affairs, with top marks given to education and infrastructure, average grades to tourism and a failure for Airport management.

"I think because of the unique jobs and exposures that I have had I am able to stand up here today and say things that might be helpful,'' Mr. Gavin Arton told an insurance industry luncheon. "This is not said out of arrogance but perspective.'' Mr. Arton, a corporate planning officer and senior vice-president of investor relations at leading international insurer EXEL Ltd., was critical of the Island's treatment of business travellers.

"A number of hotels do not offer their business guests cable TV in their rooms or even fax capability, stressing the `purity' of a Bermuda vacation,'' he said. "Some of our guests would like to stay in touch.

"Even worse, when you are trying to reach a visitor at any of our local establishments, there's no guarantee that they will even get the message.

"Improperly working air conditioning, mildew, and backed-up sewage systems seem to be the current rage in freebies offered by some of our finer establishments.'' "Maybe our new advertising slogan ought to be: Genteely seedy for $400 a day.'' On the subject of recent tourist crimes, he said: "My proposal is when caught they should be publicly humiliated -- maybe put in the stockades in St.

George's -- and have to apologise. I like John Swan's idea of bringing back the birch.'' Mr. Arton saved his sharpest barbs for current Airport management.

"Why do all airplanes seem to arrive between 12 noon and 2 p.m. in the afternoon? Why can't we have a schedule that can get business people in and out of here in less than three days? The international business sector needs to be more active in what's happening there. If the US Navy pulls out and there is no proper control tower capability, this place dries up.'' Mr. Arton gave a further warning by quoting the entertainer Jimmy Keyes: "When the rastafarians (with no disrespect to people of that persuasion) are running the tower and Ganja Airlines...do we really want to do business that way?'' But he was more laudatory on the Island's overall infrastrucuture.

"My observation on the Bermuda market as it moved through the last 20 years is that you have done a very good job in my absence of building an excellent infrastructure and the expertise to succeed for many years,'' he said.

"With the benefits of starting small and growing to fit the specific needs of a tightly focused group, we win.'' Mr. Arton gave similar laurels to Bermudian education.

"I think we are doing quite well on education,'' he said. "Hard as it is for most of us to accept, it takes time for anyone to reach the top in an international business.'' He added: "One thing that we have to be concerned about is that too many promising black males drop out of school too soon and therefore are excluded from professional careers in this sector.'' Claiming to belong to no political party, Mr. Arton also said "that the biggest failure of the UBP is that there is no viable Opposition, properly trained and ready to take over.''