Beyoncé is the greatest performer and artist of our generation. With 35 Grammy wins and 99 Grammy nominations, she is the most decorated artist in history. To put her brilliance into context, she even has the highest margin of wins within the crème de la crème. The average difference of Grammy awards among the top Grammy winners is 1.5-2 awards. Yet, Beyoncé has four more Grammy awards than anyone else in the top five. Beyoncé is outperforming the top 1 per cent of talent. Annoyingly, though, her excellence is widely disputed, underappreciated or worse — strategically undermined by religious cleavages who assert that her stardom is a result of a soul contract with evil forces.

Why does Beyoncé trigger so many? What about power on a woman makes us flinch and seek to punish her? To answer this question, and examine what I call the Beyoncé effect, we can point to research about the social costs of being extraordinary.

Excellent women are admired — and punished

Research shows that the women who succeed across sectors — politics, business, education, arts — need to perform at literally the highest level (Aniza, Berry). Comparatively, men tend to achieve success with average performance and skill. Why is that? Because stereotypical gender norms assign varying rewards and punishments for personal qualities and characteristics in both men and women. A powerful, assertive man? Irresistible. A powerful, assertive woman? Difficult. The extant literature on this is clear: women and men are navigating very different professional and social worlds. Research shows that women get a “likeability punishment” when they advocate for themselves during salary negotiations, raise concerns, or speak up in the workplace. Men, comparatively, get a professional boost when negotiating pay, raising concerns or speaking up. The puzzling thing about this research is that levels of competence remain steady during gender biases. People still think “assertive” women are competent — because they are — just not at all likeable. Therefore, the very qualities women need to demonstrate for success they are penalised for having. The mechanism for this is typically gossip: when people cannot control you, they try to control others’ perceptions of you.

Take, for example, a time when Beyoncé was called “demanding” — usually code for a Black woman who is excellent, hard-working and, rightfully, no-nonsense. This discrepancy is also political. Scholars find that because female candidates are penalised more harshly than men during elections and campaigns, only the best women emerge as successful representatives in Congress (Aniza, Berry). The implications for democracy here are worth a pause. Gender bias gives us the highest calibre or the “cream of the crop” for female candidates, yet also gives us mediocre male candidates. This research is corroborated for effectiveness once elected: congresswomen are much more effective at getting Bills passed and securing funding than congressmen. But women’s Bills are debated more — the desire to humble or knock someone down a peg is gendered.

Gender, education and high school romance

The same gender bias holds across educational attainment. For every degree a woman achieves, she decreases the likelihood of getting married. For women, educational attainment delays marital prospects; for men, it accelerates them. Patriarchal structures and cultural messaging guide men to strive for economic mobility first, and commit to women at later stages in life. The emergence of manosphere content adds to this. Manosphere activists suggest that dating is like an uber-competitive economic marketplace, and the only way for men to have value, or even be desired, is to be rich. Similarly, for women, the only way to have value, or be desired, is to be beautiful.

Take, for example, a high school boy on Reddit, who was “looking for advice on how to ask a pretty and smart girl out without getting embarrassed”. One user responded: “Make it first in life, then she’ll come to you.” This is curiously terrible advice. First, shielding children from experiences with the potential to inflict pain only weakens resiliency, emotional development and grit. Adults should be sitting in the darkness with children, not installing motion-activated lights for challenging times. Second, it’s great that he is asking for help: it is a clear acknowledgement of the present moment in time. But he should refocus his research:

• Dealing with embarrassment

• Accepting failure as a necessary by-product of a life with bold moves

• Letting whatever outcome — failure, embarrassment on a date — shape him through experimental learning

Embarrassment, failure and heartbreak are always alchemising experiences. Embrace them. Finally, if this girl is “smart and pretty”, chances are she would be at an elite school. She can reliably find her equal at Yale or Georgetown. He should hedge his bets while the costs are low, and rewards are high, and most importantly be respectful, safe and graceful if rejected.

Comparatively, young girls are often socialised to prioritise beauty to gain attention and affection from men, at the expense of scholarly and sporty pursuits. Teaching girls that love is a reward for being physically desirable reinforces toxic dynamics where worth is tied to appearance, not character or authenticity. Instead of telling girls to wait prettily in the wings, we should be encouraging them to act, risk, ask and sometimes fail. Girls, too, deserve the chance to face rejection and emerge braver — not just prettier. The landscape for girls, boys, women and men could not be more different — from high school all the way to professional careers. These gendered differences and expectations are why powerful women such as Beyoncé matter so much. She is a light for guidance, strength and example.

Beyoncé: 1 of 1 and The Only One

As a proud member of the Beygency, powerful and legendary women mean a lot to me. Beyoncé’s visibility, and her excellence, have made her an easy target for sexist and racist attacks. Yet there are multiple generations of girls who watched her move intelligently, proudly and otherworldly — setting a damn near-perfect example because, for her, the stakes are higher. Beyoncé is the most prolific star of the 21st century, and she is still underrated. Women like Beyoncé remind us of our power and strength in a world that actively discourages women from having it. Particularly in a world of fleeting viral moments, slacktivism and actresses selling their soap to appeal to the male gaze, Beyoncé stands alone. She inspires and expands what we think is possible — she created the bar, and raises it.

Her Renaissance tour was a spectacle: dazzling, political and powerful. Her tours are historic and academic. Cultural. Liberatory. And now, she is outdoing herself with Cowboy Carter, her latest tour which includes two guest stars — manager Blue and luminescent Rumi. Only Beyoncé can outperform Beyoncé because she is just that good. Representation matters, and visibly extraordinary women such as Beyoncé serve as unique markers for bias and the changing tides of public opinion.

The Beyoncé effect is about the compulsion to humble extraordinary women, even during this wave of gender progress. Although Beyoncé is, sadly, far from most of our lives, we can think about the Beyoncés in our lives, and our relationship to them and judgments about them. The research on gendered success should cause us to reflect on our social processing and subsequent decisions.

The Gender Affairs Council is seeking information about Bermudians’ preferences about gender issues in Bermuda. Please use this Google form to respond, and to assist with research and event planning.

• Tierrai Tull is the founder of Bermuda Youth Connect, studying at Oxford in the Department of Politics and International Relations on the Rhodes Scholarship