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Seeking: COO of Home & Hearthside

Major responsibility: Being a mother is a demanding job

Our client, Home & Hearthside Ltd. invites applications for the position of chief operating officer.Working directly with the CEO, this is a multifaceted role where the chief operating officer will play a meaningful and involved role in all areas of Home & Hearthside’s business with a core function of managing the family’s company’s internal growth, succession planning, finance activities, and philanthropic focus.The successful candidate will be expected to meet 80 percent-90 percent of the key requirements as noted below. Certain allowances will be made for unanticipated life events.Key role and responsibilitiesSerious commitment to producing 2.2 offspring during tenure of the job. Must be comfortable in understanding that such contemplated production may result in high-risk medical issues and/or radical personal physiological and psychological changes. Candidates wishing to consider adoption or care for extended existing family will be considered.Act as arbiter and social coordinator extraordinaire for various company and personal events while elevating the epitome of tasteful class functions.Responsibilities, include:— Responsible for primary care of offspring, further ancillary role may be required for secondary care to extended elder family members with disabilities.— Create a serene, safe, nurturing, and cultured domestic environment for primary and secondary family units.— Enhance and secure appropriate role models for offspring to interact with in their peer groups.— Provide incentives and guidance for values of integrity, ethics, personal moral code, and service to others by setting a personal life example.— Monitor offspring behaviour socially, intellectually, and physically.— Present and deliver educational opportunities, and illuminating community-centred extra-curricular activities for offspring and related family participation.— Maintain a healthy lifestyle regimen for the family unit with related dietary, and physical activity planning. Each candidate will be assessed against a Standard Health and Fitness Test. This will require outstanding athleticism, mental toughness, and commitment to workout routines, at least one hour per day preferably, with or without accompaniment of family members.— Supervise successful completion of maintenance and capital improvements for company real estate, personal assets and related acquisitions.— Oversight of all financial aspects of the family’s company cash flows, risk and investment management, retirement, pensions, estate and legacy planning.Qualifications and experience— Ability to decorate and creatively enhance family company environment.— Manage minor household repairs, knowledge of engineering an asset.— Produce nutritious calorie-conscious budget value meals.— Interact with family unit to contribute to community causes.— Organise age-appropriate, extra-curricular creative activities in art, science and literature.— Possess financial acumen and stewardship in matters of budgeting, expenses, income, and cash flows. A good working knowledge of investments, pensions, and capital markets would be beneficial.— Expected to successfully negotiate insurance, estate, investments, pension, and other contracts.— Strong recreational swimmer with ability to teach swimming and boating.— Certified in cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) and First Aid.— Familiar with child psychology, with general experience in collaborating with teachers, student aides, and guidance counsellors.— Exemplary driving record. Licensed to operate both standard and automatic shift vehicles, occasional use of large haul trucking vehicles may be required if family unit acquires animals.— Calm demeanour and stable personality an absolute must. Issues with depression and mood swings should be handled decisively and appropriately.— Fluency in more than one language would be a plus.— Ability to operate independently and maturely in confrontational situations.Strong ability to conquer challengesGiven community economic stressors and redundancy of other family members, the ability to procure a primary career position as well as a second job, will be considered a superior attribute.Severe budgetary problems within the family unit may cause a temporary (it is hoped) steep reduction in basic food supplies. Candidate must be willing to meet the disciplinary challenge of restricting her personal caloric intake in order to provide adequate nourishment to younger members of the family unit.In the event of the CEO’s premature demise, candidate must possess the ability to plan for future survival on restricted funds, a less than significant pension, and possible loss of permanent residence.Under extreme financial duress from events such as separation from CEO, or country economic decline with subsequent loss of jobs, the candidate must be prepared to seek extended employment (years away) in other countries, leaving the family unit in care of elders.EducationMinimum high school / IB level. University and master's degree or equivalent preferred in areas of childhood development, finance, or nutrition. Successful candidate will strive for continuing education credits as offspring matriculate into workforce.CommitmentCommitment for life, but a 20-year minimum time investment is required.No work permit necessary.HoursFive am to midnight, with occasional back-to-back, 24-hour shifts as required.One-half day off on alternating Sundays.Only applicants interested in making a serious commitment to fulfill this role should apply.Home and Hearthside Inc. is an equal opportunity employer.The above invitation for the chief operating officer of the home envisions an individually perfect mother perfectly placed in a perfect world. Mothers may be none of the above, some of the above, or all of the above. No matter their quality or quantity of attributes, all mothers are loved for their own true selves. They are irreplaceable at any price. Let us continue to honour them. Blessings to mothers, adoptive mothers, surrogate mothers, and mothers-to-be everywhere.In memory of our mother, Anna Clarine Sawyer Harris 1918 — 1997 who gave us (all seven) life, wisdom, virtuous thrift, an inner drive to achieve financial independence, and an intellectual curiosity that had no boundaries.