Dear Carla: Two individuals are attracted to each other. The female is in her late 40s and the guy is in his middle 20s. Is he way too young? They have had a mutual attraction for more than two years, but she feels a bit reserved about seeing him. He has no problem with it at all. He is pursuing her like mad. Should she let him or just let go. Should the one hangup about age need to be overlooked or should his advances be shunned? — Hunted

Dear Hunted: Twenty years is a huge age gap but I’ve seen it work successfully when the man is older so why not? I think the ultimate question for the two of you to discuss is what do you want from each other in the end? A relationship? Potential marriage? Just a fling? I think once you find out where each other’s heads are at only then can you move forward. Now if you are only sexually attracted to him with zero expectations that’s a different story. Take the time to get to know him and then make that determination for yourself.

Dear Carla: I have a 12-year old son who seem to be showing gay tendencies. He always hangs around girls at school, likes stuff that boys don’t and refuses to play a sport. I come from a long line of athletes and this embarrasses me a lot. I don’t know how to talk to him about it. My dad says not to worry and that he’s too young to know. I think he’s in denial. I do approve of the gay lifestyle and always said if my son was gone, I’d cut him off but now I don’t know if I could. Do I talk to him about it or wait and see until he’s older? — Torn

Dear Torn: I’m going to keep it real simple. Talk to him open and honestly on a level that he can understand and allow him to do the same. If he says he’s attracted to boys, do not judge or chastise him no matter how you feel. Let him see that you love him unconditionally. Do some research on the web and give it to him. Teach him about predators and safe sex. I don’t mean to be an alarmist but if you don’t someone else will. As far as sports, it isn’t for everybody. Support and praise him for whatever else he is good in.

Dear Carla: I am 15 and my mother does not trust me. She never lets me go anywhere with my friends and when she does he always ends up being in the same place (like the beach). How do I deal with this? — Trapped

Dear Trapped: When I was growing up I thought my parents were too strict. I felt as if I couldn’t do anything and negotiating was not an option. My mother used to tell me I was not allowed to have an opinion about some things until I turned 18. I used to think they were the meanest people ... until I became a mother myself. Now all of the things she protected me from, I am able to do the same for my daughter. I remember having a 2am curfew at 16. I wouldn’t go out because if I couldn’t leave Clay House at the end like everybody else, I’d rather stay home. And looking back, I felt it preserved me. Literally. I feel I look much younger than I actually am yet sometimes I see girls who partied hard when they were teens who now look like they are much older. I do think your mom is going a bit overboard by showing up at your social events. Perhaps you can get another adult to tell her how uncomfortable her actions are.

Dear Carla: I am overseas in college with my children. Their father does not check on them and does not send them a dime. He owes me over $10,000 in back child support and the courts do not know where to find him and neither do I. All I know he’s in Bermuda somewhere. I don’t understand how men are able to get away with this yet would lock up a person for a bill?

All I want is my children’s money so that I can better provide for them. — Not Understanding

Dear Not: Unfortunately there are many children who are being deprived of financial support from their parents (there are deadbeat moms out there too) because they choose to judge the system. The court’s bailiffs can only do so much with limited information so sometimes it isn’t as easy as people may think for them to catch up with delinquent parents. Then there’s the issue of the delinquent parent not working which eliminates the garnishment of wages. I know this is not what you want to hear, but try not to focus on what’s not and concentrate on what is. While that money would be a great help, you CAN do it. Kudos for being in school. Just doing that alone will be a great payoff in the long run. I would urge you NOT to write off that money in the system. Hopefully one day your children will receive it. Good luck.