Dear Carla: I am in my late 30s and I am unmarried and do not have any children. I always envisioned myself having at least three children and in a happy relationship at this age but I have no one to blame but myself because I was determined to build a career for myself. Now that I am successful accountant I think I have paid the ultimate price. While some people have told me that I am still young, realistically I don’t think I’m going to live out my dream. I am very sad about this. I would give up my success in order to have a family. I wish I cared as much about my future then, as I do now because I would have done things a bit differently. Please share this with your readers. Thanks. — Got Nothing

Dear Nothing: While there is nothing more rewarding than being a mother, I firmly believe that wherever we are in life is exactly where we are supposed to be. It makes no sense living in regret. Since having children may not be an option, consider fostering a child in need. It’s a great way to test the waters in order to give back to the community and receive unconditional love in return. Adoption is another option but it could be costly. If you have nieces or nephews, consider spending more time with them. And your godchildren as well if you have any.

Dear Carla: My children’s father is not involved in their lives. They haven’t seen him in over a year. Last week, a girl approached me saying that she is his ex and is pregnant with his child. She said she would like for us to be mature and raise the children to be aware that they are siblings. I have no issue with her but how am I to believe that her children is my babies’ sibling. I don’t want to judge her but I don’t want to have my kids around her child and they end up not being related. I have no intentions of having any sort of conversation with their father. — Mulling

Dear Mulling: I commend her for wanting the children to know each other but I can understand your apprehension. I think you should be guarded until the baby is born and it is somehow sufficiently satisfied that her child is their sibling. Once it’s established, allow the children to bond and develop a love for each other. The gift each of you ladies are giving your children is invaluable.

Dear Carla: My boyfriend and I were friends first and have a good relationship but he never tells me that he loves me unless he’s drunk. At first I found it cute but now it’s beginning to bother me because I don’t know who to believe ... the sober him or the brave drunken one. When I point out what he says to me he just laughs and says: I did? Who is the real boyfriend? — Is it fake love?

Dear Love: Sounds to me like he is afraid of being hurt which is why he tells you when he’s drunk. It’s important that you tell him how his alcohol fuelled confessions make you feel. Personally, I would have an issue with this and would not believe him because if he can’t tell me when he’s sober then I don’t want to hear it at all. Take a moment to look at the deeper picture though. Has he been hurt in the past? Did he give his all to a woman and she took advantage of him? Perhaps this is why he keeps that mask on. Tell him how you feel but give him time. Once he can trust, you will see a change.