This week’s instalment wings its way to you from sunny California, and The Big, Big Yes!, a personal and professional development conference hosted by creativity coach and author, Samantha Bennett.

Despite the LA smog, this weekend’s been like taking a deep breath of fresh air. To radically shift gears, change scenery and immerse myself in an environment of positive energy full of people speaking ‘my language’, was like a restorative balm. Where I had been feeling frazzled I feel calmed, where lagging I feel buoyed, and any creeping lack of motivation has evaporated in the face of group enthusiasm.

One discussion point and major takeaway for me was directed at those of us who are ‘givers’, anyone who shares themselves, their talents, their energy in helping, caring for, managing, loving … others. It is a note about the true meaning of generosity.

Real generosity is when we give from what we have, not from what we don’t.

Giving from a place of depletion leads to feelings of resentment, burnout, unfulfilment and often a desperate emptiness, craving something in return.

There is a bold distinction between generosity and martyrdom. If you’ve been on the receiving end of both you will know the difference. As you give, what is your true intention for the recipient or for yourself? Is your ‘generosity’ in fact more like selfishness?

“Give from the saucer” is a phrase I heard, deriving from the Jewish concept of Havdalah. The overflow from our full cup is what we can share, easily, wholeheartedly and with full generosity. Imagine, for a moment, that place of fulfilment. From that satisfied, abundant state, rather than being a burden or drain, ‘giving’ returns to being a gift.

So how do we fill our cups to overflowing? It’s different for all of us. We may require separate sources for our professional and personal lives, but in both arenas ask, ‘What speaks to my soul?’ Who are my ‘peeps’ that inspire and revitalise me? What are the activities that energise and replenish me?

This weekend not only filled my cup, but brewed me an entire teapot. The key though, is not to let the cup run quite as dry before topping up.

As a base, aim to start each day well-slept, well nourished and exercised (in body, mind and spirit), feeling connected, aligned, inspired, supported and loved by ourselves and others.

Check your tanks! It may take a shift in habit, approach and even belief of what’s possible for you to get to that place of abundance. Working with a coach is an efficient way to start making those adjustments. The journey from selfishness to true generosity is worth it. From this place of ‘bottomless refills’ I can say the prospect is pretty sweet.

Julia Pitt is a trained success coach and certified NLP practitioner on the team at Benedict Associates. For further information contact Julia on 705-7488, www.juliapittcoaching.com.