Let's not create hate

April 30, 2003

Dear Sir,

Today I've been to the Liberty Theatre to see 'The Pianist' - a brilliant film which depicts Jews in Warsaw during the Second World War, especially one incredible concert pianist. What this picture does is show just what hate can do.

Everyone in Bermuda should see this film - it is stark and real. It shakes your very soul. What is so terrible is that here in Bermuda hate is being expounded daily, our radio talk shows are full of hate - against the expats the whites, the blacks, people in authority etc. Every day people keep putting others in little boxes, deciding who they are, what they think, what we should do with them etc. No one has a right to determine who and what people are by anger, lies, gossip and hearsay. Every time someone says something detrimental or negative about a person of another race, another religion or a different lifestyle they influence others in their thinking and create hate. Bermudians were always known as friendly, fair and honest people and Bermuda was a happy place. I came here over 50 years ago and I thought it was truly a magical place. There were many problems then but people where polite and friendly. People of all races worked to make it better and in many ways succeeded. These days many people are unhappy, angry and jealous and working hard to create bad feelings. There will always be issues we have to deal with but we should be able to deal with them without hate. We are losing our control and common sense and our good feelings for each other.

Bermudians are not only black - they are white too. Expats here on work permits are our guests - in many cases passing their skills onto Bermudians.

We've got to stop generalising and look at people for who they are and give credit where it's due.

Many Bermudians are quite happy to listen to gossip and pass it on, especially if it's about "others".

The world is in a mess due to man's inhumanity to man. Bermuda is following right along with the rest of the world. We need to stop this nonsense and get a grip on ourselves and look at what we've got and pray a whole lot more. Let's keep Bermuda beautiful!

WORRIED FOR BERMUDA

Pembroke

Parents say thanks

May 1, 2003

Dear Sir,

On behalf of PARENTS/Parents Anonymous of Bermuda's Executive Board members, I would like to express our appreciation to the residents of Bermuda for supporting PARENTS/Parents Anonymous of Bermuda's April Blue Ribbon Community Campaign - Child Abuse Prevention Seal Appeal.

Dr. Lisa Pion-Berlin, President and Chief Executive Officer, Parents Anonymous Inc. so eloquently stated the benefits of our service in her support letter for PARENTS/Parents Anonymous of Bermuda:

"Parents Anonymous Inc. is pleased to write this letter of support for PARENTS also known as Parents Anonymous of Bermuda... to expand and support its Parents Anonymous (Adult) Groups and Parents Anonymous Children's Programs in Bermuda. We commend the fact that Parents Anonymous of Bermuda is an Accredited Organisation providing quality Parents Anonymous (Adult) Groups and Parents Anonymous Children's Programs. This organisation has been instrumental in providing Parents Anonymous programs for families in Bermuda for several (13) years.

As a result of the development of the Parents Anonymous programs in Bermuda, many parents have been able to begin the process of learning new skills, transforming their attitudes and behaviours, and creating lasting change in their lives.

Parents Anonymous Inc. is confident that the expansion of the Parents Anonymous Groups and Parents Anonymous Children's Programs will enable more families to be served, and as a result, address many of the root causes of abuse. In fact, national research confirms that effectiveness of Parents Anonymous in reducing the impact of risk factors while increasing the resiliency of parents and children resulting in the prevention of child abuse and delinquency, and an increase in positive health and education outcomes for children."

Once again, thank you Bermuda!

EILEEN M. BROWN

Board Member

Parents Anonymous of Bermuda

A dream or a nightmare?

April 19, 2003

Dear Sir,

Eva N. Hodgson has one explanation for every black ailment: "a very long term plan" to stifle and abuse black people. (Royal Gazette, this date) The "plan" is the cause of everything that besets us, though Dr. Hodgson doesn't tell us whose plan this is, or how the plan is implemented. Worse, she discourages hard work: why struggle if there is a design to crush every initiative? We share a terrible history, and there are institutions and habits that are slow to acknowledge our dignity and rights. But is there a plan, a conspiracy to perpetuate inequality?

Dr. Hodgson writes that "young black men... are more self destructive since we had the delusion of 'integration' than ever before in our history". Is this an effect of the "plan"; or the paradoxical result of our liberation? Integration gives us opportunities unimaginable a few short years ago, but our preparation, after centuries of discrimination, is fragile. We have, family to family, less money than whites, less education, poorer health, less stability and self-conviction. Athletes or rappers, not lawyers, accountants, doctors or professors, are the role models for our children. Achievement too often seems to mock us, its requirements just beyond our reach. How shall we learn to do things we were not allowed to do until recently? Is it a wonder our young people are intimidated, angry, or depressed?

Some of us fear the rigour of self-discipline. But we shall have to learn it. Many blacks do. Dr. Hodgson ignores these achievers. How does she explain them?

Dr. Hodgson may have a different way to describe blacks who meet the standards of integrated society. She may regard them as traitors, because they won't join her crusade: "... We need to come together, 'collectively' as blacks, become united, with a single 'purpose'." What is this common aim? Unity was difficult 40 years ago when blacks were stunned by our new opportunities, and stunned to realise that we could only enjoy them by competing with whites. "Blackness" was a bond that failed, because its content was largely our painful history, not a programme to remake black lives. "Unity" was often the expression of paralysis and fear, despite its aggressive face. What is unity's purpose in 2003? Should we retreat into the ghettos that crippled us? Do we want a society divided into factions: blacks against white, women against men, Christians against the rest?

Dr. Hodgson has a plan of her own. But her plan is our nightmare. She, like marginalised white citizens councils, believes the races should be separate and the black diaspora, while we meld our destiny with those who share our freedom. This is America's hope, and Bermuda's.

BERMUDA AND BROOKLYN, NEW YORK

It cuts both ways

April 26, 2003

Dear Sir,

It is most unfortunate that here in the 21st Century, racism is still a problem in Bermuda. We read about it almost every day in the news.

I believe that the majority of Bermudians, black and white, are not racists. I am a white man and some of my best friends are also white. The others are black.

I believe the days of black people being persecuted simply because of their race are a thing of the past. Not to be forgotten, for sure, but it is time to put those prejudicial beliefs behind us. I know many blacks in Bermuda who, through their own efforts, are very successful, regardless of their race.

Racism cuts both ways. As a white Bermudian I am a victim of prejudice. You don't often read about it but the fact of the matter is that as a white Bermudian. I am a member of the minority.

Racism is a terrible thing. And it is shame that it has been politicised in Bermuda. You don't believe that?

We have an election coming up this year. If you don't think race is a factor then get the answer to the following two questions.

Out of 36 candidates how many whites are running for the PLP?

Out of 36 candidates how many blacks are running for the UBP?

GREG FALZONE

Warwick

Child must come first

April 16, 2003

Dear Sir,

How did you manage to print two important and well constructed letters on the same day, [16 April 2003 from "On the outside looking in" and "No Name" USA. Both these letters put into stark reality in an accurate manner all that is wrong with the custody system (or is it the child ownership act).

Please allow me to congratulate the mother who has raised her child for 16 years without financial or emotional support, yet needing money, it was the loss of a father's role model that she felt was the most important. Madam, you have gotten it right, what good is $100 or $200 a week to a mother when it costs the Country millions a week to hire Police, drug and school counsellors, prison officers, lawyers, caseworkers, prosecutors, and judges to control the young person affected by a lack of a father? I know many other fathers and mothers have likewise raised children, but this mother spelled out in a few words how the legal system is deficient when dealing with a child's future when no crime has been committed. Well, many would concur that the judge who invariably removes the father is committing a crime against Bermuda by adding to the list of social ills by placing another child in the high risk category. The National Practitioners Network for Fathers and Families, states that 85 percent of all children that exhibit behaviourial disorders come from fatherless homes. Fatherless children were twice as likely to drop out of school, and achieve lower grades.

The letter writing mother makes numerous valid points which, if acted on by the powers that be, would in short order turn our Island home around back to the Bermuda most would prefer. She states that many mothers refuse access and information pertaining to their children and, many children grow to hate the mother while taking on a feeling of being unloved. This leads to looking for gratification in all the wrong places. The advice this truly caring mothers gives to selfish mothers who are damaging all of Bermuda is "stop it". This lady deserves a hug.

The writer 'No Name' says that judges should become educated before making rulings, and that some mothers use children to get money or to take children to another country because of a new boyfriend. This he states is not in the best interest of the children. The answer? Put the fate of children into the hands of a trained gender sensitive, dispute resolution panel and out of the courts. Vote now during your local candidate's visit.

EDDIE FISHER

Sandys