Unsafe boat race

August 22, 2006

Dear Sir,

I was on the public beach section of Elbow Beach enjoying the lovely weather we were having. As a resident, I was aware that the powerboat race was on, but noted that there were no warnings to swimmers put at the entrance to Elbow Beach that the race was on and that they should be careful. The only clue that the race was on was a single buoy about 100 yards off shore and a boat located off Coral Beach.

Thinking it was safe to swim on the beach side of the buoy, I decided to go off for a swim. This swim was interrupted when the first boat came racing by me (yellow paint) on the beach side of the buoy. The boat missed myself and a visitor and his son by about 15 yards. Clearly this boat was off the course and dangerously close to shore. I note this because all the other boats came by outside of the buoy and a safe distance from swimmers.

I think it is a great event and was fantastic watching the other boats go by from the safety of land. However, safety must come first. I would suggest that all beaches should have public warnings on the day of the race and that all drivers who stray off course and put swimmers at risk should be disqualified and banned from racing.

Restoring the race

August 23, 2006

Dear Sir,

When I was growing up, one of the most anticipated events of the summer was the Round the Island Powerboat race. Not any more. This year I was at one of the South Shore hotels for lunch when they came by. One of the waiters told the guests what was going on. It was a bit embarrassing when only a small handful of boats went by, and that was it.

The Powerboat Association needs to figure out how to get more boats involved & how to make the race more exciting, especially for the North Shore folks. In the past, when the boat went into Harrington Sound, then the boats came close along North Shore. Now they are out in the shipping channel where nobody can see them. I remember that when they stopped going into Harrington Sound, for safely reasons, they had a buoy near Flatts that they boats had to go around, which kept them close to North Shore.

Another idea would be to remove the number of Bermuda sanctioned races a driver had to do in a season before they did the ?Big? race. This would allow boats and drivers from outside Bermuda to participate.

That brings me to my third and last suggestion? Money!!! There should be prize money, a decent amount per winner of each class plus a bonus for breaking the race record for their class. This would mean sponsorship? Have a large company sponsor it, ACE Insurance or HSBC/Bank of Bermuda etc.

Doing the Lord?s work

August 22, 2006

Dear Sir,

In the year 2006, The Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in Bermuda and said, Once again, the earth has become wicked, over-populated and greedy and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another Ark and save two of every living thing along with a few good humans.? He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, ?You have six months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights? Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard ... .but NO Ark!

?Noah?, He roared, ?I am about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?? ?Forgive me , my Lord?, begged Noah. ?But things have changed. I needed a building permit and I have been arguing with the planning inspector. My neighbours claim that I?ve violated the neighbourhood zoning laws by building the Ark in my yard and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the Development Applications Board for a decision.

Then the Hon. Ewart Brown, the Transport Minister, and Colonel Burch, the Works & Engineering Minister, demanded a bond be posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark?s move to the sea. I argued that the sea would be coming to us, but I guess what they say about these two is true, because they would hear nothing of it.

Getting the wood was another problem. There is a ban on cutting local cedar trees in order to save this rare species. I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the birds, but, then again, no again! When I started gathering the animals, I got sued by the SPCA and the rest of these animal rights groups who said that the circus recently was bad enough, but this is the last straw and that I am confining wild animals against their will.

As well, they argued that the accommodations were too restrictive and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space. Then the Hon. Neletha Butterfield, Minister of the Environment, ruled that I couldn?t build the Ark until they had brought in ?consultants? to conduct an environmental impact study on your proposed flood my Lord. I am still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission, the Immigration Department and the BIU on how many foreigners I?m supposed to hire for my building crew. and insist that I have to hire only locals and Union workers with Ark-building experience.

To make matters worse, the Bermuda Customs and the Bermuda Monetary Authority seized all my assets, claiming I am trying to leave the country illegally with laundered money and endangered species.

So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least ten years for me to finish this Ark, ...j ust look at the Berkeley Institute and how long THAT took!? Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a beautiful rainbow stretched across the sky.

Noah looked up in wonder and asked, ?you mean you are NOT going to destroy the world my Lord??

?No?, said the Lord... ?This PLP Government already beat me to it.?