Hector can only imagine the red faces and muttering that must have happened when Premier Alex Scott and Deputy Premier Ewart Brown had to stand for Bermuda's national anthem, also known as God Save the Queen, in front of a delegation of the 'who's who' in the Caribbean tourism industry. At the start of the Caribbean Hotel and Tourism Investment conference a lively and quite regal version of the ode to the mother country blasted from loud speakers while Mr. Scott and Dr. Brown stood next to politicians from Barbados and St. Vincent, both of which became independent nations before 1980. Hector can only imagine that the two men were thinking "next time you're here we'll be signing a different tune."Someone really should tell Tourism Minister Ewart Brown that orange isn't his colour. So it might as well be Hector. The Deputy Premier really didn't seem himself on Monday as he arrived late for a press conference on plans to spice up Bermuda's nightlife. Hector wondered if the jet-setter was a little bit flight-fatigued from one of his many trips overseas? Or might he just have been a bit on edge about the number of times he would have to use the words "cool", "fun", "hot" and "sizzling" in his address (in reality only a few times, but it felt like much more)? Dr. Brown's speeches to the media are normally pretty "sizzling" themselves, but this one definitely lacked pizzazz, so Hector was curious as to what was wrong. And then the penny dropped — the problem had been staring him in the face all along. Dr. Brown, normally exquisitely dressed in beautifully-cut suits, was simply mortified by his own outfit. Someone, somewhere (it surely couldn't have been his own decision) had told him it was a good idea to wear a bright orange Bemuda-branded cap and jumper in front of the Island's media. They were wrong. Dr. Brown must be given top marks for going all out to promote Bermuda as a holiday destination. But he goes to the bottom of the fashion class for allowing himself to be talked into wearing bad, bad clothes in public. Please stick to the tailored look in future, sir.Talking of lacklustre, had Premier Alex Scott actually seen his speech before he read it on television and radio on Tuesday night? If Hector didn't know better, the stilted delivery might have led him to believe it was Mr. Scott's first glance at the "Age of Empowerment" address. Of course, what really matters is what the leader of the country is saying. But surely a few practice runs and a little more "pop and sizzle" might encourage people to actually listen. Hector's request for an advance copy of the speech was

turned down by the Department of Communication and Information with no explanation as to why. Yet copies were readily available for international media before 8 p.m. at the aforementioned conference. Hector can't understand all the secrecy — it's not as if the speech contained any surprises.