Schoolyard fights are rarely front page news in Bermuda or anywhere else.

But the controversy that has surrounded this newspaper's reporting of a fight in Hamilton between a Berkeley Institute student and her counterpart from Warwick Academy, while a large group of students watched and egged her on seems to have struck a chord.

It is welcome news that the authorities at Berkeley have taken this matter seriously, and Commissioner of Corrections Lt. Col. Edward Lamb's comments have obviously stirred great debate.

That's good, and it is to be hoped that it will lead to a serious discussion about child-rearing, school discipline and producing young people who are ready to be productive and contributing members of society. Earlier this week, US President Barack Obama told a joint session of the US Congress: "Dropping out of high school is no longer an option. It's not just quitting on yourself, it's quitting on your country – and this country needs and values the talents of every American."

Much the same thing can be said of Bermuda, and graduation rates and academic excellence are inextricably linked to school discipline, the teaching of responsibility and mutual respect. This matter is now before the courts, so it would be wrong to comment on it in detail. Nonetheless, it is of concern that the mother of one of the children concerned felt "that was the end of it" when she learned her daughter had been involved in a fight and the Police had been called – that should have been the start of her concern, not "the end".

Lt. Col. Lamb's comments were correct, as far as they went. There is ample evidence to show that parenting is the most critical factor in raising children, so Lt. Col. Lamb's examples of poor parenting show how children can go off the rails from an early age when a poor example is set. But that does not excuse teachers from doing their part nor school authorities. In Berkeley's case, it has some autonomy to suspend students quickly and decisively. But the overall school discipline code is so tortuous and legalistic that it removes the ability of teachers and principals to act quickly to instil and enforce discipline.

And others need to remember their part too. Politicians, civil servants, sports administrators and coaches, business leaders and the like all need to remember that they lead by example, and when their actions are negative or cause conflict, young people will follow that example. The media in the broadest sense also gets some of the blame for increases in violence, lewd behaviour and so forth. This newspaper is a firm defender of freedom of speech, but parents, teachers, broadcasters and retailers have an obligation to children and teenagers to ensure that they are not exposed to information and material for which they are not prepared.

Similarly, the community needs to get past the assumption that bad behaviour of any kind is someone else's problem. Adults need to act when they see it, and not ignore it by assuming that it is someone else's problem. Bermuda is too small for anything to be someone else's problems, not least because the ultimate results of poor behaviour will affect us all, one way or another. We have seen too many murders, road deaths, assaults and lost lives to place all the blame on someone else – whether it is parents, teachers, television or anything else. We are all responsible, and if we do not act, then we are quitting on our country.