This is a review with a difference - the first review Hack has ever written about a meal that involves no more than a bite or two.

For the gourmands who follow this column, apologies at the start - this review is pretty much all liquid diet. Not by choice, however.

The Heritage Court, which you might be more familiar with as ‘the well-appointed lounge adjoining the Hamilton Princess' posh lobby' has always been a Hack favourite for a tasty nibble and sophisticated cocktail.

Although gourmet pizzas, perfectly peppered tuna steaks on warmed greens, and decadent ice cream sandwiches have all been happily gulped down on previous occasions, one of this columnist's favourites has long been the Heritage's Thursday night ‘Oyster and Chablis' promotion.

A little worried that June is a month without an ‘R' - oyster connoisseurs knowing that oyster season is generally confined to R'd months - Hack and a few pals rang up the Heritage Court yesterday afternoon to inquire if oysters were still to be had.

Assured that the succulent bivalves were still on the menu we headed for the Heritage Court for a Thursday happy hour-come-light dinner.

Sinking into the hotel lounge's deep armchairs arranged in cozy nooks facing the Heritage Court bar, we were in short order served up cool glasses of crisp white wine and a plate of oversized oysters.

The Heritage Court isn't a cheap place to hang out, but it is a nice one. The Fairmont's Hamilton Princess website describes the Court as having a design concept that “takes its cue from the rich architectural tradition of Bermudian ancestral homes and its colour palette from the abundant flora and water images of this unique British territory. Lounge chairs, sofas, quality artwork and antiques create an intimate and elegant, yet informal setting for cocktails and conversations.

It sounds (and feels) a little elitist but Hack has always been surprised by the diverse crowd the Heritage Court draws.

The prices are at a premium - even for Bermuda, so bear in mind that everyone is there at a price.

Once in a while Hack figures a little splurge is in order. Others probably feel the same - but expectations also accompany that.

Although the food and drink has always been good, the service solid, Heritage Court also offers an entertainment element.

Some nights there is live piano music but more than that, it is a good spot for people watching. A few months ago a meal there found Hack & Party dining next to a table that included former Premier and now-Dame Jennifer Smith, a few members from the Cox clan, the well-known political family, and former Housing Minister Lt. Col. Burch.

Thursday night was no exception. A former Registrar of Companies and present-day Government Minister were dining near us while several reinsurance types networked over drinks and hors d'oeuvres at more distant tables.

In another corner, a cozy table had been set for a couple adjacent to the Court fireplace.

Our celebrated neighbours all looked happy tucking into haute-cuisine plates leading us to eagerly reach for our first oysters.

Wait. Stop. What is that? A live organism was found moving rapidly around in the oyster juice of Hack's plate.

A little nonplussed we called our server's attention to the situation.

Her reaction was something like: “Oh, oh yes. It is alive. It is a worm. Don't worry I've seen much worse in terms of bugs and food. Would you like some new oysters?” she asked.

We declined, tried to put the unsavoury oyster experience out of mind and continue sipping the rest of the Chablis that had come with our oysters. It was nearly out of mind when our server, without asking, delivered the bill. The tab for our moderate liquid diet came to $80. That isn't a bad cheque for an evening out but then we didn't actually eat anything and we could have had a drink or two each, for a lot less, elsewhere. In the end we left feeling a little cheated. We'd gone to Heritage Court for oysters, and we didn't get it. That was our first disappointment but it was a worse rub to be charged full fare for our glasses of Chablis that if Hack's memory is right are usually offered at a reduced rate as part of the oyster promotion.

In fact, Hack was left wondering why a drink or two hadn't been offered on a complimentary basis after the worm episode.

Recalling the post-worm dialogue with our server brought to mind a buried memory from Hack's boarding school days when an earwig found in a fish finger got a “They eat those in other parts of the world” from the roving Headmaster.

All in all the experience hasn't scared Hack away from the Heritage Court for good but it won't be for oysters. Columnists are only as good as their last column. While the same can usually be said for a restaurant (it is only as good as the last meal you had there), we have had many a fine meal and drink at the Heritage Court. We'll give it another try, expecting that this was a one-off bad experience.