When Fabian attacked Bermuda with all its fury it left not only material damage in its wake but also many angry and frustrated citizens who are becoming increasingly stressed at the continued disruption of their daily lives.

Things like having no electricity, telephone or television, no public transportation or garbage collections, and an unending host of other inconveniences are beginning to take their toll, as is the inability to effect immediate repairs to roofs, gardens, vehicles and more, or even remain in one's own home.

The continued absence of running water, refrigerators, clean clothes, home entertainment, and even personal privacy is both wearing thin and taking on greater importance as the days go by. As a result, relationships, both business and personal, between adults and adults, adults and children, and even children and children, are being impacted as tempers grow steadily shorter, and even minor problems become magnified.

As a society, Bermudians have long grown used to a certain standard of living, a lot of comforts, and being able to have what they want when they want it. Suddenly, on September 5 all that changed, and people were expected to adapt.

Some evoked a pioneering spirit and simply got on with it, while others have become mired in negativity.

According to Vaughn Mosher, managing director of Benedict Associates, a counselling firm for employees, this need not be. The key to coping, he says, is serenity, as defined by St. Francis of Assisi in his eponymous prayer written centuries ago: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; The courage to change the things I can; And the wisdom to know the difference."

Defining each line as a separate part, Mr. Mosher said that people often adopted parts one and two, but stopped before the all-important third part.

"I find that people in general really get it when they deal with all three parts," he said. "In a situation like this, which has befallen all of us to a greater or lesser degree, the ones who are really rolling with the punches are those who have accepted (the hurricane and its aftermath) as a normal course of life. (Their approach is:) 'I am still alive, and this too shall pass. First things first: what do I have to do to set my priorities?' That is where courage comes in."

Therefore, setting priorities, then working through them one by one, and ticking off the completed items is a sound approach to reducing stress and getting things back to a more manageable state.

"The long and short of it is that people who get their anxiety and anger raised are the ones who say, 'Why me?' " Mr. Mosher said. "A lot of people can't get to acceptance because they think they have to be able to change things which they cannot change. Still others are disagreeable because they just don't want to think of all they have to do but must work up the courage to get on with, and they get angry about that."

In addition, the ongoing uncertainty of not knowing when things like electricity and water will be restored is also making people anxious, angry and frustrated because they have no definable time frame.

"Not knowing how long something is going to continue before they have some semblance of order is giving rise to a tremendous amount of anxiety which then turns to frustration and anger in a lot of people," Mr. Mosher said.

Again, he pointed to courage as the positive approach.

"People could ask themselves 'What do I need to do in the next five or 25 days? What courage do I need to have to last me if it is going to be longer?' Acceptance is an ongoing struggle for all of us to maintain."

If it helps, they can formulate a written plan.

Mr. Mosher is particularly pleased to note that people who have "got a hold on life in terms of a healthy philosophy or faith" are reaching out to one another and saying, 'We are so grateful to be able to help'.

"It is phenomenal what is going on on the radio," he said. "There are all kinds of reaching out. These are the people who have the serenity and accept the present situation as a rough patch which too shall pass. Once a person has that acceptance then they get on with the things they have to do, and sometimes that takes a lot of courage."

Turning to the third part of the Serenity prayer - 'The wisdom to know the difference" - the professional counsellor said this was "the clincher" in terms of dealing with life's problems.

"Like so many others, I am meeting people on the street, a lot of whom have an acceptance of (the aftermath of Fabian) and say, 'It could have been a lot worse'. When you take (the situation) piece by piece, everyone who has a complaint can turn it around and into a plus. For example, people who are unhappy because they have to stay with friends could be saying, 'Thank goodness I have friends to take me in.'

"When it comes right down to it, someone may have lost all of their worldly possessions in the storm but they still have their lives and a future."

Mr. Mosher also reminded the public that Bermuda was a community with a long history of helping others in need, both here and abroad, and he urged them to have faith.

"Just as we do when other beleaguered countries have problems, so too is the outpouring in Bermuda tremendous. What goes around comes around. If good goes around, it will also come around. Equally, if anger goes around it too will come around."