It was an event that must have had Sir Francis Drake, Lord Nelson, Sir George Somers and any other seafaring hero turning in their graves.

Hundreds of spectators turned up at Sandys Boat Club yesterday to watch the annual non-sense filled Non-Mariners Race.

And with the object of the exercise being to sink as soon as possible, it was not surprising to see competitors putting the most unlikely of ship-shape craft on the water.

Non-boating enthusiasts gathered at Mangrove Bay as early as 11 a.m. to start building their craft and the beach was awash with the sound of drilling and hammering as the rafts, made out of washing machines, cast iron trunks, a television set and even toilets, began to take shape.

By 3 p.m. all ten boats had made their way across Mangrove Bay to the starting line and the non-race unofficially got underway, accompanied by the sound of the Non Calypso Pipe Band playing on the dock side.

For the next 15 minutes, pandemonium broke out, with crew members attacking both rivals and spectators with water pistols and water bombs.

And while some craft did manage to complete a course of sorts, most non-sailors were content to sabotage the opposition.

MC Tim Taylor, who provided a running commentary of the race from the club house, admitted he was at a loss as to who had won -- or indeed lost.

As complete chaos broke out on the water, Mr. Taylor, who had managed a highly polished and professional analysis of the race up until that point, eventually confided: "I just have no idea who the winners are at the moment -- but this being a non-race that doesn't really matter.'' A deflated Wendy Griffin, whose Hash House Harriers team somehow managed to stay afloat and finish the course, said: "We just weren't competitive enough -- had we wanted to win then we wouldn't have finished -- but it's been great fun.'' The non-crew of the White Lion's Marriott Party Poopers, which partially sank and failed to get past the starting line, eventually proclaimed themselves the non-winners.

Back on dry land, crew captain Paul Maccoy said: "I think the result shows how obviously appalling our seamanship is.

"I wouldn't know the difference between the stern and the pointy end.'' Colleague Richard Lettington summed up the attraction of the event: "It's just a silly thing to do and silly people tend to enjoy doing silly things.'' Photos by David Skinner MESSSING ABOUT ON THE WATER -- Crew members of Spaceman Spiff Rocket, one of the few `boats' to complete the Non-Mariner's Race course yesterday, take aim at a rival craft.

DANCING GIRLS -- The Non Calypso Pipe Band kept the crowd entertained yesterday at the Non-Mariner's Race .

COMPETITION CPN