heads of thriving households filled with the bustle and laughter of children, today their lives are often lonely, unfulfilled and near-meaningless.

The spouse has gone, the children have moved away, friends have died and there they sit -- alone in the home they love, but which is now becoming too big and burdensome for one.

Seniors fight hard to maintain their independence -- one of their worst fears is ending up in an institution -- but the aging process is taking its toll and some of the things they did easily are now becoming difficult.

And how slowly time passes! Hours seem like days, days like weeks. Nights, especially, feel endless because seniors require less sleep than they did when they were younger.

They read constantly about rising crime and they are nervous. What was that noise? A burglar or just a creaking floor board? Those aches and pains. Are they getting worse? Will they die alone and not be found for days? That is a big fear.

Wouldn't it be nice, they think, to have someone to talk to -- if only to say "good morning'' or "good night''. Someone, perhaps, to share a meal with, or who would assist with the odd chore or two. Someone with a car who could give them a lift to the shops, or a restaurant, or even take them beyond the same four walls for a short drive? In other words, they'd like someone to live right in the house with them -- not as a "babysitter'' but as a friend. Someone whose independence would not be compromised, as theirs would not.

Well, there's good news for you, seniors! Such dreams can become reality thanks to the Shared Housing programme operated by Age Concern, a registered charity.

"The concept behind Shared Housing is to allow seniors to retain their independence and stay in their own homes,'' project co-ordinator, Mrs. Janet Jackson, said. "It is good for their morale, and far healthier mentally than being in an institution, however nice that may be.'' The programme, which matches senior home owners with potential sharers, is operated with great care. There are built-in safeguards to protect both parties as far as humanly possible, and even a trial period before such an arrangement can become final.

Initially, home owners and sharers must register with Mrs. Jackson at Age Concern, each paying a once-only, non-refundable $20 registration fee which is also valid for any and all subsequent matches.

Comprehensive registration forms, one for home owners and one for sharers, are designed to ascertain as much relevant information as possible so that the best possible match can be made.

Questions include hobbies and interests, willingness to share chores, use of telephone, how food is to be paid for, and special needs.

Mrs. Jackson interviews both home owners and sharers in their own homes because it gives her greater insight into the dwelling and the individuals concerned.

"Both parties are more relaxed and comfortable in their own homes,'' she explained, "and you can tell a lot about a person from their home -- how they keep it, their interests in music and books, for example.'' Next, references, which must be supplied by both parties, are carefully checked and screened.

Once this process is complete, Mrs. Jackson painstakingly searches her files to try and come up with the best possible match. She first contacts the home owner about her suggested choice, and if that person is agreeable, she then arranges a meeting between the two parties.

"I take the sharer to the owner's home, and generally spend about five minutes or so getting them acquainted. Then I leave for a while and come back.

That gives them a chance to talk and know each other better.'' Sometimes, the home owner -- who gets first option on any decision since it is his or her home which is on offer -- decides right away whether or not they want the sharer in their home, but often they say they want to think about it.

Occasionally, Mrs. Jackson said, things are done much more discreetly. "The home owner will ask to secretly `see' the potential sharer without the latter's knowledge. In that case, I have to make the appropriate arrangements.'' Financial and other arrangements are also hammered out in advance. "Some owners don't charge rent but require certain chores to be carried out in lieu, while others may charge a modest rent and want to share utility bills. Details vary from person to person.'' Once a suitable "match'' is agreed, the sharer then moves into the home for a trial period of one month, during which time Mrs. Jackson will monitor the arrangement and help to iron out any problems.

"I tell the sharer not to give up whatever accommodation they have during this period, in case it doesn't work out,'' she said.

But if all goes well, and the arrangement becomes permanent, a proper lease is then signed by both parties, setting forth the terms and conditions under which they agree to cohabit.

If the arrangement does not ultimately work out, either party is free to end it by giving three months' notice, and both may then re-register with Shared Housing without incurring another fee.

While some arrangements may differ between parties, there are certain basics which are common to all. Separate bedrooms so that each person has a private area of complete privacy are a must. The homeowner must agree to maintain the home to a certain standard, and the sharer must be the flexible party since, as Mrs. Jackson, says "older folk are set in their ways, and it is their home after all.'' And what sort of people are eligible to become sharers? They can be male or female, and of any responsible age.

"Seniors are not necessarily looking for someone their own age to share with,'' the co-ordinator explained. "Many of them like a younger person because that adds life to the home and stimulates interest. Age has nothing to do with how well two people can function together. Rather it is a matter of someone with whom you share common interests and the same standard of values.'' She noted that policemen are popular with seniors because they feel safer with a policeman around, and the programme had placed quite a few. "Other sharers are people who enjoy seniors and are looking for a modest rent while saving to go abroad to further their education. Really, there are many, many reasons why people are interested in shared housing,'' Mrs. Jackson said.

Since its inception three years ago, the shared housing concept has proved an ideal solution for more than 150 seniors, but Mrs. Jackson feels that many more can be helped.

"We want people to lose their fear about sharing,'' Mrs. Jackson said. Apart from the obvious advantages of friendship and perhaps easing of expenses, shared housing is a way of keeping seniors in the mainstream of life instead of them vegetating alone.

"Old people still need to be part of life, even if they are living alone,'' the co-ordinator assured. "Men, in particular, don't cope as well as women and they get very depressed, especially about the things they can't do any more.'' And the mental stimulation which comes from other human beings is also important.

"To my mind, television is not stimulating,'' Mrs. Jackson said.

Anyone interested in participating in the Shared Housing concept should telephone Age Concern at 293-4436.

MRS. JANET JACKSON -- "The Shared Housing programme allows seniors to retain their independence and stay in their own homes.''