Secretary Mr. Ken Richardson, who never drinks alcohol or smokes, has every right to ask himself "Why me?'' But it is a self-indulgence the 53-year-old will not allow himself as he battles to get back to his desk in Government following a second operation to have a brain tumour removed.

First he must regain full use of his speech, which he came close to losing forever during the five hour operation at the Presbyterian University Hospital, in Pittsburgh.

He was also warned before going under the knife that he could wake up partly paralysed, so close was the tumour to the part of the brain that controls movement in the right side of the body.

Fortunately, though, the operation appears to have been a complete success, with the patient expected to make a full recovery. It seems Mr. Richardson has once again defied the odds.

In 1988, he had been given only a 25 percent chance of surviving an operation to have his first brain tumour removed. Two years later he was in hospital again, this time to have a kidney removed.

His most recent illness was totally unexpected, especially since doctors had told him there was only a five percent chance of another brain tumour forming.

He has a CAT Scan every year and the most recent one, in May, 1991, had failed to pick up any abnormality.

Some people could rightly believe that fate has dealt him a lousy hand, but not the man with most cause.

"I never feel sorry for myself,'' he said from his home in Trimingham Hill, which he shares with his wife Brenda and 20-year-old daughter Tammy, who is on summer recess from college overseas.

"Once you start doing that you've lost your chance for survival. My family won't allow me to do it.

"They never wallow in pity. That is what is helping me to recover so quickly.

They don't come moping around: they're always cheerful.'' Mrs. Richardson will never forget the day in May when she woke up at 3 am to find her husband lying unconscious following an unexpected seizure.

"He did not have any noticeable signs like he had before the first brain tumour operation,'' she said. "He'd put in a normal work day, watched television, had dinner, read his work papers and gone to bed.'' A CAT Scan at King Edward VII Memorial Hospital revealed a large tumour and Mr. Richardson's family immediately made plans to fly him to Pittsburgh, where Dr. Doug Kondziolka, the surgeon who performed the first operation in Canada, was now practising.

Mrs. Richardson, their son Andrew, 23, who is studying abroad, and Tammy flew to be at his bedside and comfort him through his ordeal.

It was hoped to use revolutionary `gamma knife' surgery for the operation because it is quicker, safer and less risky than conventional surgery. It does not involve an incision into the scalp, relying instead on radiation to attack the tumour.

But Mr. Richardson's tumour was larger than the one and a half inch maximum allowed for this approach, so he had to go under Dr. Kondziolka's knife once again for between four and five hours.

Dr. Kondziolka, who was aided by the hospital's head of neurology Dr. Dade Lundsford, went in through the same incision he had made four years earlier.

He kept Mr. Richardson's family informed of the operation's progress while it was being performed and they knew before he had been stitched up that he would not be paralysed.

They had to wait until Mr. Richardson woke up before they knew if he would ever talk again, although he could barely string more than a few words together in the initial recovery stage.

Within two weeks, he was discharged from hospital and on his way back to Bermuda.

Thirty eight days after the operation, he is still struggling to talk normally due to continued swelling of his brain, but he hopes to have his full speech back before the three to six month period estimated by his doctors.

"One of the most frustrating things was not being able to talk to my family,'' said Mr. Richardson. "I refused to write notes in order to force myself to talk again as quickly as possible.

"When I did start to speak again, I confused the words `yes' and `no', saying the one word when I meant the other.'' Brenda chipped in jokingly: "I should have asked him if he would buy me a new diamond ring.'' Mr. Richardson walks twice a day for at least 20 minutes, either outside or on a treadmill at his home.

Both he and his wife agree that he is making a more rapid recovery than the last time -- rapid enough for him to have hopes of resuming as Cabinet Secretary before too long.

"I will go by the advice of my doctor but I will recover fully and I will return to work,'' he said positively.

Any fleeting moments of self pity are quickly dismissed by thoughts of others who are suffering.

"While I was in hospital there was a young English girl who was born with her intestine outside her body,'' he said.

"She needed an intestine and liver transplant. A day after the operation she was up asking for a glass of water.'' Mr. Richardson would like to thank everyone who has helped him through his illness, in particular the surgeons who saved his life, his local doctor Dr.

Beresford Swan, the nursing staff at King Edward VII Memorial Hospital and his family and friends for their support.

LAUGHING IN THE FACE OF ADVERSITY -- Cabinet Secretary Mr. Ken Richardson is still smiling despite his latest medical ordeal.