of socks, a tie, or maybe something more grand like a new pair of P.J's.

But aside from the gifts and the honour placed on some Dad's for "Being the Best Dad in the World'' or "number one Dad,'' this should also be a day when they reflect on their responsibilities and relationships with their children.

Bermuda has a growing number of single-parent homes -- whether it be due to divorce, separation, or the parents were never married to begin with.

And because of this, groups like the Fathers' Resource Centre was formed with an aim to bring fathers together to talk and discuss the good and the bad sides of parenting.

Recently, the Fathers Resource Centre held a retreat where father's spent valuable time with their children taking part in different programmes centred around their fathering skills. They were also able to discuss their feelings with other men.

Mothers were also invited to the retreat as the Fathers Resource Centre believes strongly that both parents are important in the raising of a child.

President of the Fathers' Resource Centre, Alvin Goulbourne, said the thing that was really special during the retreat was watching how the fathers interacted with their children.

"For example, there was one little girl that had problems sleeping and we could see her father get up in the middle of the night taking care of his daughter. It is usually thought of as the mothers job but he did a good job,'' Mr. Goulbourne said.

He added: "In another case a mother said to me that her husband is a good father, but he has always been reluctant to take his rightful place as a parent. He has always taken a backseat to her, he didn't have the self confidence.

"But she did not go to the retreat on purpose and after the father and children came home she noticed he had a lot more confidence in his fathering ability.

"There was one incidence where the children needed some attention and he went and took charge.

"That is one of the many reasons behind these retreats. We get to see how other fathers relate and it gives us ideas on how to deal with our own children.'' Mr. Goulbourne also said divorced parents attended the retreat. "We had one divorced couple that got along with each other very well and the children were better off for it.'' He added that these retreat weekends aimed at bringing fathers together to discuss the good and bad sides to parenting, gives men another resource and the freedom to call upon another man to help in a situation.

"Men do not network, we network only in the office. We had a nice session where the men got together and talked about some of our experiences.'' Mr. Goulbourne said men need to know that the most important job for a man is being a father and it is also the most meaningful.

"The most important job is not the 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., the job will be there but your children and family are what is important and some of us are sacrificing our families for the so-called success and once that happens we will realise that that success is hollow if we don't have our families and our children,'' Mr. Goulbourne said.

He added: "Some of us our so busy giving our children the things we didn't have that we forget to give them the things we did have such as time, love, helping with homework and the together time.

"I feel passionately about the idea of fathers remembering what is important.

The accumulation of possessions does not bring happiness particularly to our children. It is all about relationships.'' Mr. Goulbourne also said that fathers can spend time doing many things with their children.

"It depends on the ages of the children when deciding what you can do to spend time with them. If you have a four-year-old you can do piggy back rides, reading and tickling. If you have a ten-year-old their needs are different.

"Find out what they enjoy, something that is healthy and wholesome. The beauty of that is that they come from you so sometimes they will like to do whatever you like to do.

"If you like football, don't just take them to a game -- play football with them. Do active things as opposed to passive.'' Mr. Goulbourne added: "You cannot have quality time without quantity. There is a misconception of this idea of quality time, but it is a time that comes as a result of quantity you cannot do it in 15 minutes and you can't always plan it, it just happens.'' The fathers that make up the Fathers' Resource Centre have several shared beliefs concerning their children and their relationships. Here are a few that are worth remembering: Children need and want fathers who are positively and responsibly involved in their day to day lives.

Men's lives are transformed by the experience of committed fatherhood.

Fathers can learn from one another how to be more effective parents.

Men must encourage each other to support their child's mother in her mothering role and to be active partners in parenting, regardless of the status of their personal relationship with the mother.

Parenting responsibilities should be shared equally between mother and father.

When children grow up with little or no contact with their father, they assume that fathers are not an important ingredient in their lives. This is dysfunctional and leads to another generation of children growing up without their fathers.

Most fathers, if allowed to be a parent, will act responsibly as a parent.

No fit parent should be penalised -- whether by gender or career -- by being reduced to the status of a visitor in his or her child's life.

Shared parenting is in the best interest of both parents. Divorced, separated, and unwed parents learn ways to cooperate and work towards a common good, when dealing with the joint responsibility of raising a child.

Steve Thomson and son Nicholas attended the fathers' retreat President of the Fathers Resource Centre, Alvin Goulbourne, gets lots of parenting practice with his two children, Alvin III and Illiana.