This education is not only about sexually transmitted diseases but about the choices that each person has to make regarding the right time to have a sexual relationship, with the possible long term consequences to overall health from these infections, and also the choice to abstain from a sexual relationship.

This brings me now to talk about the wider topic of sexuality as against sex.

We are all sexual beings and need to be taught that this is an integral part of who we are, which affects how we react to different situations throughout all our lives.

It could be said that all children need to learn about sexuality from their parents, initially, but we need to recognise that there are parents who are not comfortable discussing any topic that has to do with sexuality or sex.

This can also apply to health educators, whether they are teachers, nurses, doctors and this feeling is then transmitted to the children making them less likely to be open and frank in discussing their ideas and concerns. When talking to children about sexuality, it is important to remember that all children are curious, and giving them correct information in an objective manner is a more conducive approach to increasing their knowledge, than becoming emotional about these issues and possibly passing on our own prejudices and any negative feelings we may have about certain behaviours.

All children need to feel that they can trust the person they are confiding in. Teenagers need to know that you are concerned for them personally and want to help them make the choice which is right for them. They need to feel that you are there to be supportive and non-judgmental about those choices.

For those educators who are not comfortable discussing these topics, there are excellent tools available to help, for example, books and leaflets, educational videos, and workshops. For those teenagers who find it difficult to talk to their parents, there is now a pilot scheme in 3 of the secondary schools using peer counsellors who have been specially selected and trained in helping their contempories to deal with their problems and who can also direct them to other helping services if necessary. I am looking forward to the time when this programme will be extended to all schools as I feel that it will make an invaluable contribution to the emotional health of our children. Let us remember that the teenage years are a time of transition from childhood to adulthood. There are many issues that they are confronted with and it is normal for them to feel confused about choices at times. Add to this the pressure from other teens, some adults, and some movies and TV programmes to have early sexual involvement, and it is no wonder that they become even more confused. There is a need to "belong'' and to be part of the crowd! Teenagers need to be reassured that it is alright to move at their own speed and not everyone elses! I have addressed most of my talk to adults, but here are some of the things I would say to teenagers: Some important things for you to remember are: Don't let anyone pressure you, or rush you into any situation you are not ready for.

Don't rush anyone else into anything.

Don't feel that you have to prove how great you are by the number of sexual experiences that you have.

Don't blame yourself endlessly for any mistakes that you make: We all make mistakes. Often that is how we learn.

If you try something and don't like it, then stop, you don't have to continue.

It's often very difficult with sexual feelings to be sure and decided.

Take responsibility. If you make a decision to have a sexual relationship, get all the information that you can about health risks. Including pregnancy, and sexually transmitted diseases. This is very important. The younger a girl starts to have intercourse, the higher at risk she is for developing cancer of the cervix. Use some form of birth control to protect against an unwanted pregnancy, and use a condom to give yourself the maximum amount of protection available, but remember, nothing is foolproof! It's OK to abstain from having sex. You will have a lot less to worry about! And in conclusion, some words from a 17 year old, who said "I have at least 50 to 60 more years of being sexual, I'm sure I don't have to worry about doing anything right now!'' Thank you for listening, I invite you to listen next week, when the talk will be about relationships.

BERMUDA HEALTH DEPARTMENT HEALTH AND SOCIAL ISSUES HTH