Rolisa finds meaning through transformation
After years of therapy, it took three words to give Rolisa Camille the power she needed: I am enough.
She taped the sentence to her mirror three years ago, determined it would make a difference; she's now offering the “life-changing” therapy to the island.
“I was an ‘outside' child,” she said. “I'm mixed and was bullied growing up. I suffered from severe depression when I was in university; suicidal ideation.
“For me it was always, ‘Am I not white enough? Am I not black enough? Am I not pretty enough? Why am I being rejected by my other family? Why am I not accepted?'
“I just never thought I was enough — ever.”
Two years ago she discovered Rapid Transformational Therapy. A hybrid treatment created by British therapist Marisa Peer, it promises to transform clients in one to three sessions.
“People can go to therapy once a week for years without seeing results,” said Ms Camille, who was sexually abused for much of her childhood.
“She set out to challenge conventional therapy and that's exactly what she did.”
Ms Peer's online course, The Uncompromised Life, changed her life, the 33-year-old said.
“It was so radically transformative for me that I knew I had to learn it. I wanted to help other people that had been through similar things,” she said, explaining how “the guilt, the shame and the blame” surrounding sexual abuse make it difficult for victims to speak up.
“Bermuda is rampant with sexual abuse,” the Ocean Rock Wellness therapist said.
“A lot of people that have gone through something like that believe that they're not worthy, they're disgusting or dirty. They're scared of what their family will say, so people don't do anything.”
RTT uses hypnosis and hypnotherapy, cognitive behaviour therapy and neuro-linguistic programming to get results. She has seen its impact on people with eating disorders, depression and anxiety and those struggling to lose weight.
A session typically lasts two hours, sometimes more if “deeper work” is required. Ms Camille typically puts people in a trance to access their subconscious. Clients must then agree to “hypnotic conditioning” — they're sent home with a recording that they must listen to over the next few weeks.
“You have to show them that maybe they weren't loved by a parent like they wanted to be, maybe they were bullied, maybe a teacher didn't praise them, but you don't live in that world any more.”
She struggled with being rejected by her father's family as a result of her parents' affair.
“Many children grow up that way wondering ‘What's wrong with me? Why don't they want me?' If I didn't matter to my own dad, why would I matter to other people?
“When I got older it really set in. That's when I really started to believe those beliefs I had as a child — I am not enough.”
According to Ms Camille, such beliefs are common, typically shaped in childhood.
“Our beliefs create our actions and our actions create our behaviours and our reality,” she said. “We use regression therapy to help us get to the root, the reason, the cause of whatever the issue is.”
On Saturday, she gave a lecture at Charities House on self-sabotage, and how people can avoid the common practice. “A lot of people are setting resolutions and trying to achieve and set goals for themselves; RTT can help.
“The fear around failure and procrastination — all of those are elements of self-sabotage, especially rejection.
“I would tell people I was going to do something and then never do it. As much as I wanted to change, why couldn't I change?
“I hated my dad doing it to me. We play the only part we've ever known until the part becomes our own. If you change the thought you can change everything.”
There are some clients who have been sceptical.
“They say this is a cult thing, black magic, but it's being put into schools in the UK as a new programme because it's so successful. It all depends on the client and how willing they are to change.
“For some people the change is immediate. I have one friend, she was diagnosed with cerebral palsy at one year old and she was like, ‘My posture is different. I'm walking different. I've changed. I can tell by the way I'm walking and talking, acting.”
From her own experience, she knew it worked.
“I'd see therapists but there was always something fundamental missing. When you can have that lightbulb moment of where your beliefs came from, your beliefs are yours to change,” she said.
“My self-esteem grew, my confidence grew, my value, my worth — everything from there grew.
“Now I know what I'm meant to be here for, I know how I'm meant to help people and I'm owning that.
“If I can make one person breather easier on the planet, then I know my life has meaning and purpose.”
• For more information, e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org