It certainly has been a strange week for me - and a week of mixed emotions.

Once I realised when the Digicel Cup competition was, I was always going to play in it.

It has been the target for my return to playing and as it got nearer it became clear I was going to make it.

I have kept Kyle aware of my progress as I worked through my rehab and on Wednesday I told him I was definitely going to play.

The physio had told me the gaffer was okay with me going but I wanted to check so I went to see him.

He said it was actually great timing because there were no reserve games planned and it was better for me to get some match practice rather than just more training now that I am back to fitness.

He was happy for me to go so I called Kyle and we sorted out travel arrangements - I was due to fly to Barbados yesterday morning. Then on Saturday we played against Forest and Dave Kitson pulled his hamstring. I get a call from the assistant coach about 9.30 a.m. on Sunday telling me that the gaffer didn't want me to go because we were down to two fit strikers and he wanted me to start on Saturday against Wigan.

I had to ring Kyle a few hours later when it was nine in Bermuda, and told him the bad news.

It was a very apologetic phone call but he obviously understood that I wouldn't be able to make it.

It was a strange call because I had been thinking about playing for Bermuda for a couple of weeks and I wanted to come back and play for Kyle in his first game and do my bit to help Bermuda progress in the competition.

But with Kits out and Nicky Forster still injured we are down to two strikers at the club, me and Lloyd Owusu, something I have been waiting for all season.

When you are used to starting every week and then you have a few months being on the bench, you can't pass up an opportunity like this to get back in the first team. I got my chance when Forster was first injured but then I hurt my calf against Leeds and that was the end of my run in the team.

I was devastated by that and I thought that was going to be my chance of first team action gone for a few more weeks.

All this is really is unfortunate timing because the day after I have agreed with Kyle that I am okay to come back and play for him, I get my chance again at Reading.

I can't miss this, the club really needs me, and I am now pretty much guaranteed a run in the team for four or five games because of these injuries.

This is a chance that I want to grab with both hands because it would be a real shame to waste it and I don't want to be thinking ‘maybe I would have been better going off to play for Bermuda after all'.

I am looking forward to a prolonged run in the team, this is what I have been waiting for all season, and I am confident that even when the other boys are fit again, I am going to make it hard for the gaffer to drop me.

That has got to be my aim and I am sure I can do it.

It is going to be hard because the Wigan game on Saturday will be my first match for a few weeks.

I was exhausted after a 15-minute game in training, so it is going to be hard playing a first-team match.

It is all very well training but it is never the same fitness as playing matches. But I'm sure I'm going to be able to get back in the swing of things.

And if things go as I plan, I hopefully will be able to link up with Bermuda if they progress into the later rounds of this competition.

If I have cemented my place as the number one striker then I would be happy to come back out and play for Kyle if he needs me - it is easier to leave your club when they really need you.

You want to go away with them thinking ‘when is Shaun going to be back' rather than when you are on the edge of the team so no one misses you.

I hope to be involved in the later stages of this competition and I truly and sincerely wish the boys the best of luck in the games this week.