It is getting close to that time of year again. You know what I mean, just past Valentine's Day, romance is in the air. June is fast approaching and dreams, plans, and strategies for the largest month of weddings abound.

And who wouldn't want to have the perfect wedding? Celebrated for thousands of years as the civil (and religious) union of two people who care about each other above all else. Care enough to embrace love and commit to sharing whatever life brings. Care enough to look forward to the glorious times and courageous enough to understand that there may also be times that are incredibly tough.

Respect Returned. A large part of a couple's relationship process is their shared visions, the inspirations of a better life, the dreams of a establishing a home in their community and securing a socially and financially successful future, and the social progression of each other through life's passages. In the beginning, though it is just about love, loving simply, being loved and respected in return.

There are many synonyms for respect: adore, applaud, appreciate, approve, cherish, commend, credit, delight in, esteem, eulogise, extol, fall for, glorify, go for, hail, honour, idolise, laud, marvel at, moon over, praise, prize, rate highly, revere, treasure, value, venerate, wonder at, worship. All of these apply to interactions between a couple that are a contingent part of a mature and caring relationship. Can another word for respect for each other mean financial compatibility? How do you handle financial matters now? Do you know anything about how your dearly beloved handles his / hers? Have you ever really discussed how you feel about money? If you are contemplating marriage, why not take this little compatibility test? The questions can only be answered yes or no. More than 13 - yes answers mean that you have found your financial soul mate.

1. Do we talk about money regularly?

2. Have we decided who will handle the bills after we marry?

3. Do I feel that my future spouse handles money well?

4. Would I feel comfortable if my future spouse made a purchase of $2,000 without telling me?

5. Does my future spouse know what my future and retirement dreams are?

6. Do I know how much savings including investments (and debt) my future spouse is bringing into our marriage?

7. Do we have more than five credit cards between us?

8. Do I know how much my future spouse makes and how much he/she is saving in a retirement plan or other savings?

9. Does my future spouse avoid sitting down and talking about money with me?

10. Do we have the same financial dreams?

11. Do I feel that my future spouse keeps his / her money separate as if it is his / her own forever?

12. Did I ever talk about money with my parents?

13. Do I know how my future spouse would feel if I just decide to quit my job and start a business?

14. Do we agree on how much income we need to live comfortably?

15. When we talk about money, does my future spouse understand and listen to my point of view?

16. Do I think that my future spouse is a cheapskate?

17. Do we have a financial plan that we are comfortable with?

18. Have we talked to a financial professional about starting off on the right foot?

There you have it. See how your scores add up. you need to initiate some serious discussions to promote a better understanding of each other's perspectives on money, and what you want out of life. you seem to understand each other, but you need to work on the areas where you don't agree.Well, I guess it was love and compatibility at first sight. You are well on your way, and should be putting a joint investing plan in place that will grow along with your relationship for the rest of your lives together.

Is it better to know what is ahead, or is it better to dream of what can be, and put a financial plan in place to make it happen.

Martha Harris Myron CPA CFP? is a Bermudian, a Certified Financial Planner™(US license) practitioner, VP and Manager, Financial Planning at Bank of Bermuda. She holds a NASD Series 7 license, and formerly owned a US financial services practice meeting the needs of 400 individual and corporate clients.

Confidential Email can be directed to marthamyron@northrock.bm