We hit the gym to lift weights, but sometimes the heaviest thing we carry is in our heads. You know, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what it really means to be fit, Not physically fit, but mentally fit. We talk about working out our bodies, eating right, and getting enough sleep, but we don’t always think about the weight our minds carry.

Carrying anger is like walking around with a backpack full of bricks.

About 12 years ago, my mom and stepdad, who we always called Dad, divorced. Honestly, I never saw it coming.

We grew up in a Christian home, and he had been part of our lives since I was young.

I thought we were rock-solid. But life surprised us, and after the divorce, I basically stopped speaking to him.

I told myself it didn’t matter, but looking back, it took a lot of energy to stay upset.

Research shows that holding onto anger can increase stress hormones like cortisol, raise your blood pressure, and even weaken your immune system.

It’s almost like your body is fighting a war it can’t win. You think you’re punishing the other person, but really, you’re punishing yourself.

Over the last few years, something in me has shifted. I realised that whatever happened between my dad and my mom wasn’t about me.

I may never know the real reason for their split, and honestly, that’s OK.

What I do know is that he was always good to us, and even after the divorce he continued to support my mom in his own way, right up until her passing.

Last weekend, we went to see him on a road trip to visit my daughter, Zavia.

It was surprisingly nice. He looked happy, and I thought to myself, who wouldn’t want a 70-year-old man to enjoy his life?

He’s retired now, married to a sweet woman, and they seem comfortable and at peace. And you know what? I felt peace, too.

Reconnecting with my dad has lifted a weight I didn’t even realise I was still carrying.

My stress levels dropped, my heart felt lighter, and my mind felt clearer. That’s mental fitness.

It is not just about staying positive or pushing forward — it’s about letting go of the negative things that keep us stuck.

So, if you find yourself holding on to anger towards someone, take a step back.

Ask yourself if it’s really worth all the energy, all the stress, and the extreme toll it takes on your mental well-being.

Sometimes, the best workout for your mind is not pushing harder, it’s letting go.

Staying mentally fit means protecting your peace, choosing forgiveness, and allowing yourself the freedom to move forward. Trust me, it feels a whole lot lighter.

Stay Peaceful & B-Active For Life!

• Betty Doyling is a certified fitness trainer and figure competitor with more than a decade of experience. Look for B. ActiveForLife on Facebook