nothing fabulous going on? Well then: surprise, surprise -- you're wrong! While the rest of the world's travel, hospitality and entertainment industries seem universally bent on making celebrants pay through the nose for the privilege of welcoming the new Millennium, Bermuda's own West End Development Corporation is sticking to the old adage, "The best things in life are free.'' Following months of detailed planning, Wedco has lined up a gala, non-stop programme of entertainment, dancing, fireworks, and razzmatazz guaranteed to let revellers bring in the new Millennium in high style -- and absolutely free.

Dubbed Time Warp 2000, the New Year's Eve extravaganza at the Royal Naval Dockyard is designed to please everyone.

Music, some of it written especially for the occasion, will include big band sounds, soca, techno-music, and more, and feature some of Bermuda's best known musicians. Local dancers will perform specially choreographed routines, and a sparkling, carnival-style costume parade is also planned.

Large screens, strategically placed around Dockyard, will allow those unable to fit around the live entertainment area (to be set up on the green at the eastern side of the Clocktower building) to catch the action by camera relay wherever they are.

A host of food stalls, serving everything from hamburgers to ethnic dishes, will ensure that no-one goes hungry, and a special champagne bar will put the fizz into the midnight hour.

Finally, to ensure that the night is a safe one on Bermuda's roads, special public transportation has been laid on to eliminate the temptation to drink and drive.

"Time Warp 2000 will kick off at 8 p.m. with the Piece of the Rock band playing music from the big band, swing era, which will be really exciting,'' says Wedco's Special Events Coordinator and administrative assistant, Ms Miranda Pedro. "Dancers from the In Motion School of Dance will perform all the swing dances of the era in time to Piece of the Rock's music. The dances will be choreographed by the school's director and teacher, Miss Liz Pimental.'' During the intervals when the stage is being prepared for the next act techno music will keep the crowds a-jumpin'.

"Techno music is totally digitised, and fits in with our theme of the Time Warp,'' Ms Pedro explains. "Michael Spencer-Arscott of DDM Studios is the wonderful guy who is writing it all, and his music is space-age, Star Wars style. It really is dynamic.'' Again, the versatile In Motion dancers will perform during this segment.

Next up will be the specially formed Time Warp 2000 Show Band in a production written by singer, dancer and choreographer Deletta Gillespie.

"Deletta grew up in a musical family and originally came to Bermuda with Greg Thompson's Follies. She's a great person -- very talented, very musical,'' says Ms Pedro. "Many Bermudians will remember the original Time Tunnel show at the Sonesta hotel, which she wrote.

"Deletta's Time Warp 2000 Show will be an hour-long segment featuring Motown, Blues Brothers, disco era, and dance craze -- and use all local musicians.

Some of the people from the Time Tunnel show will also be in Time Warp 2000 as well as some new performers.'' Taking revellers up to midnight will be Bermuda's own international star, Heather Nova (born Heather Frith), who enjoys enormous popularity in Europe, and is rapidly expanding her following in North America. The singer and recording artist's first album, Oyster, sold over 200,000 copies in just a few months.

"Heather's music is classed as rock, but it is very easy to listen to,'' Ms Pedro explains. "She will do the countdown taking us up to midnight, and it is interesting to note that, as a child, she spent a lot of time in the Dockyard while her father's boat was being built -- so it's like coming home for her.'' At midnight, the skies over Dockyard will come alive with the bangs and flashes of a spectacular, 10-minute fireworks display, following which there will be a special, inter-galactic parade by Carnival Crew.

Wedco getting ready for Time Warp 2000 "Mr. Choy Aming is developing the space-age coloured costumes to be used in the carnival parade,'' Ms Pedro says. "Carnival Crew will be performing to soca music by Piece of the Rock band.'' Finally, DJ L. DeWitt Thomas will keep the revellers boppin' and hoppin' until the projected 3 a.m. close-down.

"But we may go on longer, depending on the crowds,'' Ms Pedro hints.

As any self-respecting reveller knows, you can't rave the night away without fuelling the inner engine, so food stalls offering a variety of fare will be set up at the head of the Slipway and also (appropriately enough) in the Victualling Yard.

"There will be food prepared by the Muslims, as well as a soup bar, burgers, and all the usual things. In addition, there will be a specialty coffee bar, a regular drinks bar, and a champagne bar,'' Ms Pedro says.

Dockyard restaurants will also be offering special New Year's Eve menus, for which dinner tickets must be purchased in advance. The Special Events Coordinator warns that no personal supplies of food or drink, including coolers and picnic baskets, will be allowed into Dockyard on this occasion.

Instead, tokens will be sold for exchange at the food stalls.

To add to the enjoyment of this fun-filled evening, large areas of Dockyard, and particularly those surrounding the Clocktower building, will be off limits to vehicular traffic. Police will be on hand for parking and traffic control, and those who prefer to arrive by road will be directed to park at the commercial dock.

For those leaving their cars at home (which Wedco hopes will be the majority), the Public Transportation Board and Marine & Ports are laying on buses and ferries throughout New Year's Eve.

"The last buses and ferries will leave Dockyard at 3 a.m.,'' Ms Pedro confirms. "We want to encourage as many people as possible to use public transportation instead of drinking and driving in order to keep it a safe night on the roads. We are also going to work with the Road Safety Council to help promote a safe New Year's Eve for everyone.'' The special Time Warp 2000 logo, revealed for the first time on this page, has been designed by Rick and Leigh Hawke of Computer Concepts, and will be used on all advertising and promotional material, which is also being handled by Computer Concepts.

Ms Pedro anticipates that souvenirs bearing the logo, including T-shirts and posters, will be available for sale on New Year's Eve.

Plans for Time Warp 2000 have been underway since April, and while she has been in overall charge of the project, Mrs. Carol West of the Frog & Onion pub has been co-ordinating all of the food and bar service details.

While this great outdoors party is free to the public, it represents an enormous capital outlay to Wedco, as a result of which it is appealing for financial assistance.

"This is a very expensive event to produce,'' Ms Pedro says. "So we are looking for sponsors to underwrite some of the entertainment, fireworks and operating expenses. Anyone wishing to assist should call me at 234-1709.'' Illustration by Rick and Leigh Hawke of Computer Concepts Millennium marker: This is the West End Development Corporation's official logo for the New Year's Eve celebrations at the Royal Naval Dockyard. Designed by Computer Concepts, it will be used on all advertising and promotional material connected with the huge outdoor party to welcome the new Millennium.

World-class act: Bermuda's own international star, Heather Nova (born Heather Frith), will take revellers up to midnight.